Corrupted Love - #Soukoku

Chapter 14 - No More Regrets

Six months later

I sat between the two tombstones where Chuuya now had joined Odasaku. It was a bright spring day in the middle of April, only a few days away from Chuuya's birthday. " it's funny how everything I said backfired." I sighed. "I resigned from the Armed Detective Agency after your death Chuuya. And Odasaku, I'm sorry but I couldn't keep your promise. I left Atsuhsi-kun in Kunikida-kun's care. I'm sure that he will take better care of him, let alone better than I ever could." I rested my head against Chuuya's tombstone and I looked at the cloud-free sky. "A spring without you." I sighed. "Well, you at least kept your promise to me Chuuya. Being my dog since your loss that day years ago." Regret sprung back through me as I recalled the sweet memories of our first game. "I'm sorry about leaving you in the Port Mafia like that, but I'm sure you understand why I did what I did," I continued. "I'm sorry about blowing your car up too, but I knew that you would look for me if I left it. Mori-san would've thought that you were a traitor too and he wouldn't take it lightly. I didn't want to ruin your life more than I already had done." Maybe everything would've ended differently if I had let him find me? "Do you know that Mori-san once asked me 'why is it you wish to die?'" I asked them after a moment of silence. "My answer remains the same; Is there really any value to this thing we call 'living'?" I wiped the tears that had managed to slip. "Anyhow," I finally got up "I'm sorry, both of you, for letting you down once again," I told them while I walked further away from them towards the town I had spent years roaming along its endless streets. I struggled to find my phone in my pockets while being on the move but finally succeeded in picking it up and dialed Kunikida-kun's number.

"Hello?"

"Hi, kunikida-kun, It's me."

"Dazai?"

"Yes, do you have a moment?"

"Sure."

"I just want to ask you for a last favor."

"What now?"

"Take good care of Atsushi-kun for me will you?" I asked him.

"I will take care of him. Why tell me that out of a sudden?"

"There's no practical reason, I just wanted to tell you that. Well, bye for now." I hang up as I walked through the alleys of Yokohama. The ones I knew so well, the alleys that felt like home. I walked up the stairs in one of the many abandoned skyscrapers in the city. He should already be at the top waiting for me. This really brought back the bittersweet memories of the times I arrived a few minutes late and have him argue with me about it. After what felt like hours I finally reached the top, just as expected he was already there.

"Hello, Akutagawa-kun. Long time no see." He stood there in his black outfit, viewing at Yokohama from this height.

"Hi."

I jumped up at the edge of the rooftop and balanced my way across. "How have you been?" I asked him as I wrote a message on my phone.

"Good, be careful or you'll fall." He warned me as he saw how close to the edge I stood.

"I have everything under control. Now Akutagawa-kun, I wanted to let you on a little secret."

He looked suspiciously at me.

"I know that you've been blaming yourself for my decisions of leaving the Port Mafia years ago and, to be frank, it has nothing to do with you. It's not because of your lack of accomplishment or skills."

He looked at me, slightly shocked by the news. "Then why?"

"I was betrayed, fooled if you wish. Backstabbed, call it whatever you like. I lost both a friend and a lover thanks to the Port Mafia."

He looked at me with a baffled expression. I didn't expect him to say anything either.

"That's why I left."

"Why are you telling me this now? After all those years of doubt?"

"Maybe it's the right time? But regardless of that, I want to tell you that I am proud of you Akutagawa-kun. I also hope you find a happy place soon enough, the Port Mafia is not a home."

"Really?" His eyes shone in pure happiness even though he tried to conceal the happiness and somehow, the comfort of my words.

"Yes." I smiled at him as I sent the message I had written. I leaned backward, letting my weight drag me down.

"Dazai-san!" Akutagawa rushed over to catch me, failing in doing so in time.

The building flashing by my eyes as I fell, the only words filling my head as I fell to my death were the ones I had sent to Atsushi-kun; I will be watching over you from afar. Save Akutagawa-kun.

I always knew that this life would be a losing game. "I will see you soon. Chuuya. Odasaku," I whispered while slowly closing my eyes, embracing death for the last time. In those last moments, I saw a glimpse of Chuuya and Odasaku having their arms open with a bright and welcoming smile plastered on their face. I smiled back as I let myself get embraced before the pain crushed through me, breaking every bone in my body, leaving me in a haze of darkness.

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Hello, my loyal readers!

Thank you thank you for sticking with me through this painful journey, that sadly has come to an end. This will mark the last chapter of my fairly short fanfiction about those little dorks. I hope you still enjoyed the stay despite the pain and tears, I, at least enjoyed writing this.

For now, good-bye! And I will maybe see you interacting in my upcoming fanfics in the near future :)

Take care and be safe!!