Inaugurate Chapter 1

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Sometimes you expected the good in life, sometimes you expected the bad... many things of trying to find what you think of what you want, what you deserve, what you need in a desperation of being loved or being isolated. Many times we want to live... many times we just want to die...

It's not like the world is ending literally...

Although that is what most people think about...

Other than laying my head down over on the front school bus in front of me, I laid my arms down, the wheels on the bus, no pun intended, gives out a rhythmic rhyme on the road, the gravel road has a couple of bumps and a few splashes of the water puddles from the side of the roads, the light rain sprinkled not to hard but will later today and the very gentle breeze felt great.

Having my black wired Skullcandy Icon 2 Headphones 2011 on, Black Celebration by Depeche Mode, I enjoy how dark this song sounds, it gives out a perfect vibe for a rainy day, the cold and rainy weather mixed with this song gives me comfort.

As I leaned up and leaned on my right shoulder against the side of the bus, I was overlooking through the window, the rain continued to drip lightly and I couldn't wait for another sense of time to myself. The city of Chicago, Illinois on a light stormy day of the driven school bus towards White Oak High School, the entire town looks like it will be on the verge of a riot from the streets below of a higher road, the travels of going around the time to collect children to a rotten school... isn't much of a fun time... the large rolling thunderstorms started to get a bit more heavy, as the raindrops kept on hitting the ugly school bus.

Most of my time is just listening to the darkness in music, the understanding of horrors of everyday life in one of the most cruel cities in the USA, corrupted by the powers of street gangs at night, the murders or killers just waiting for the right moment to strike their next victim...

Sure that is my life of course, danger lurks everywhere in Chicago, it's not like I'm just gonna die from someone being insanely crazy right? Oh wait that's right... I'm slowly becoming one of those people, that is what it means to be a Goth kid right? Maybe...although this growing darkness within me keeps on going, it's a never ending kind of isolation, pain and loneliness. That one...fucked up kind.

Along the fading music it has been changed to Bela Lugosi's Dead by Bauhaus, the song gives me a sense of relaxation if I'm going to be honest, the rhythm, the beat, the chilling of the guitar and the little darkness in the vocalist's voice gives out a haunting tune. During the song I couldn't stop staring at the heavy storm clouds piling up, the shades of bluish-gray clouds started to turn into a darker shade of blue, hinting that it will be raining all day or all night.

The more I got drawn to the cloudy sky, it felt like I was almost being hypnotized by the clouds just piling up over the other cloud to the next, even if life can sometimes be hypnotizing, life can be gone in a matter of seconds sometimes, and most of the times you can't keep on running away from reality.

I always hate my reality, how despicable it is due to the terrible influences of Susan and Ruben Sharp. Ruben Clyde Sharp; an abusive,alcoholic, and smoker father of age forty three,to his messy thick and wavy medium black hair, that covers most of his eyes and the underlining of a squared beard shape with some sight of a stubble shave, knowing that I share his thick messy hair, I hate being related to him when I resemble most of him. He has those angry or aggressive expressions that can scare me and my sister for life, besides being a scary man even if he was a military soldier even if no one on the force messed with him. Ruben has a couple of scars that proves that he is an aggressive soldier, he has a scar on his left neck, most of his short chest hair hides a scar on his upper stomach along with a scar on his left hip, he has no regrets of his scars on his white skin tone. Knowing that Ruben can be scary with his brown fierce animalistic eyes, his height is likely to mock shorter people since he almost reaches up to six point five feet tall and weighs over two hundred and three pounds.

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