forget him | kim doyoung

★ Stupid Boys

Dear diary,

Why do boys think it's okay to touch a girl, even after she says no? Even as a way of comforting, why is touching necessary? Why can't they just stay away and try to calm you down? Like Jihoon?

If Jihoon wasn't there, I don't know what I would've done. Maybe screamed? But who would've heard me when the cafeteria was so loud?

Maybe I would've started crying ... which would've shocked Minjun, right? The whole scenario was too much for me, I don't know why. Once I got back up, I promised myself not to go back to the vending machines again.

Jihoon didn't tell anyone about it when I came to the table, but Hyunsuk later got to know. For some reason, I remembered what happened and started crying hard in my room. Hyunsuk came over and just hugged me and patted my head. I figured Jihoon must have told him what happened.

I was mad. Mad at Jihoon. He didn't have a right to tell anyone about what happened. Yes, he was involved, but that doesn't give him a right. But I am also happy because the comfort Hyunsuk gave me was enough to make me feel alright.

He promised me I wouldn't have to see Minjun again, and that made me happy. Maybe I will see Minjun from afar, but as long as I have Hyunsuk and the others beside me, I think I will be fine.

The fact that Jihoon was observant enough to see where I was going and seeing Minjun follow me made me really happy. He had an eye on me, and really, what else could I ask for? I was getting more than I could ever imagine. And that made me happy.

I probably won't show this entry to Doyoung. I don't want him to see it. He will get mad at me. For not telling about the Minjun scene and maybe not showing any interest in getting over Jihoon.

It's not that easy, and I hope Doyoung learns that somehow.

I'll probably write a fake entry now and copy this onto the notes. Let's stay strong, Eun. You can do it.