Will of the Many~ Poe Dameron

There's something about drinking cheap wine under the stars

A region of chaos and moonlight. She liked it there...

-Anais Nin

The familiar numbing prickles stabbed a million times over the entire length of her arm, pulling her awake from her dead slumber. She squeezed her eyes shut as she turned her head in towards her pillow, then she carefully relaxed her brows as she moved her head to look out towards the room.

Her eyes fluttered open and immediately found Poe's hand wrapped around hers. Even in his sleep his fingers held her with such security she knew he wouldn't let go. Her fingers tightened around his hand as she carefully moved her thumb along the back of his hand. She watched with heavy eyelids as his fingers instinctively clutched tighter around her.

She kept impossibly still as she admired their hands. While she traced each of his fingers with her eyes she had the realization that she had made a habit of falling asleep holding Poe's hands. No matter what mess they made throughout the day or their missions, they always came together at the end of it and reached out for one another before they fell asleep.

But... they were going back to base. Their last location had been a success- although they were not nearly as subtle as Coorina's Senator would have liked, the First Order fleet retreated without any kids to condition into future Storm Troopers.

Their mission was over, meaning Serena would be back in her own bed with Kaydel sleeping next to her instead of Poe.

Serena knew her nightmares would return with full force. There was something about Poe that calmed her down to her core. But without him or his hand to hold... the shadows would swallow her whole again.

She pushed the nasty thoughts away as she focused back on their conjoined hands. If she was going to have the nightmares again, she would soak up every last bit of peace she could.

"That feels nice." Poe's morning voice seeped into the still air.

Serena's thumb paused its soothing tracing as she tilted her chin to look through the boards of her headboard at the top of Poe's curly head. He turned his head towards their hands, but she could only see half of his forehead.

"Morning." Despite him being awake, she settled back into her pillow and continued her tracing. She used the tip of her thumb to draw extravagant shapes that covered the entirety of his hand.

"We're going home today."

Home...

"Yeah," Her voice cracked, but she hoped Poe would assume it was from misuse.

"Can I say..." Poe stalled as he pushed himself up to his elbows. With his fingers still tangled around Serena's her arm was pulled off her bed and tugged halfway between their beds. She lifted herself to her left elbow and tilted her head to the side to meet Poe's gaze. "I'm going to miss this," He held up their hands. Serena looked down at his fingers wrapped over her hand. "I feel like... you know me better than anyone else in the Resistance. I know this mission's only been a month, but for some reason I feel closer to you than some of the people I've known for years."

Serena's heart picked up an unsteady pace as she gulped. "I-" She licked her lips as she slowly looked up his forearm, bicep, over his bare shoulders and pecks, and landed on the chain around his neck. Her mouth dried as she had the perfect image of his half naked frame in front of her. "I feel the same." She lifted her gaze half a foot to look into his beautiful, sleepy brown eyes. His curls stuck up on one half of his head and flopped messily over one another to create a mountain of tussle. He had the barest shadow of a beard along his jawline trailing down his neck. "I was terrified of coming on this trip with you because I-" She took in a breath as she looked down at their hands again. "Leia told me that I would have to open up to someone eventually. She said that it'd be scary but that it would all be worth it." Poe's hand tightened around her and held steady. "I like opening up to you, Poe." Her thumb caught on his middle knuckle and pressed down. "It's not as scary as I thought it would be."