Found In the Past

19

Scorpius's POV:

I look up from the parchment in my hands, a small smile tugging on my lips. "Love, Albus," I re-read the line over and over, just to make sure it's there. And it is there. Scrawled at the bottom of the note in his adorable-yet-sloppy excuse for cursive. I fall back onto my bed, holding the letter to my chest. I take a deep breath in and sigh, closing my eyes to block out my dark room.

Why can't you just admit it? I wince. Because it would ruin everything-

"Scorpius?" I hear a soft voice ask. My eyes shoot open and I bolt upright, irrational fear spiking through me. She can't read minds. Right?

"Y-yes, Grandmother? Come in!" I call back before remembering the letter in my hands. I quickly smooth it out and slide it under my pillow as the door opens. I sit up awkwardly and turn to see a slender woman walk into my room, a tentative smile on her worn face.

"You grow every time I see you," Narcissa Malfoy laughs quietly, closing the door behind her. It's been years since I would hide in a broom close, terrified of Narcissa, but it's still odd that we've grown so much closer. I guess being shut up together for a month does that.

"You saw me at lunch," I remind her with a small grin.

"You still grow every time," she walks over to my bedside, avoiding the many books I have spread out over my wooden floor. "What's wrong?" My grandmother raises an eyebrow as she pulls the sheets up over my bed. We sit, and her blue eyes bore into mine, sending chills running up my spine. That reading mind thing is definitely an option right now.

"Why do you assume something's wrong with me?" I try to dodge the question, but it fails. She tucks a piece of white hair behind her ear and gives me a wry smile.

"Your father was my only child. You both have that same 'everything-is-blue' look. Now. What's bothering my favorite grandson?" I sigh and reach up to play with my hair. The action reminds me of Albus and I wince, pulling my hand back. "Is something wrong with Mr. Potter?" I feel my face start trying to give my secret away, and bite the inside of my cheek to stop myself from blushing

"Y-yes he's perfect. He's fine. He's perfectly fine," well it seems my voice has other plans to expose me.

"You don't have to tell me, you know," Grandmother takes my hand in hers and gives me a faltering smile. "I understand..." Her voice climbs higher.

"It's just..." the look in her eyes makes my heart break. I want to tell someone about what I'm going through, but enough people hate me already. If even one of the people who loves me can't look me in the eye, I don't know what I would do. "I can't," I whisper, my voice turning more raw than I intended.

"Scorpius Malfoy," My grandmother says sternly, a surprising amount of power in her voice, "I'm not going to desert you. I love you. You're my wonderful, brilliant, charming grandson and NOTHING can change that. Just tell me and maybe I can help?" I feel tears prick in my eyes at her comment.

"I... what if I... fancy someone?" I whisper, throwing it out there before I can stay closeted.

"That's wonderful, darling!!!" My grandmother smiles widely and I can imagine various ideas of girls that may be racing through her head. "Who is the lucky person?"

"Grandmother.... but it's not a.... it's not a.... a person our legacy would approve of," I manage to stutter out, giving up on the word 'girls.'

"Your love life has nothing to do with a legacy," she tells me sternly, letting go of my hands. "I will love anyone you love. No matter their blood-purity, gender, house, or literally anyone as long as they make you happy," her blue eyes blaze with a passion-lit fire and I nod, tears once again pushing against my eyes.

"Thank you..." I hug her and she stiffens for a moment but quickly wraps her arms around me. "You have no idea how much that means to me."

"I'm trying to make up for the mistakes I made with your father," she whispers, and I feel something wet land on my shoulder. I hug her tighter. "Aren't you going to tell me who it is?"

"Uh...." I blush nervously and pull back.

"You don't have to, Darling," she reassures me quickly. "But my promise not to judge will always stands."

"It's... just... I've been confused for so long. Like parts of it I've hidden from everyone for so long, and I have to... some things... I need to say but it's so hard," I tell my grandmother quietly.

"Say them."

"I... I don't think I like girls," I close my eyes, barely able to breath as the words finally make their way to the front of my mind. "I only wanted Rose's acceptance. She's so brave, intelligent, and has this incredible spark... but I want her true friendship. I don't love her in the fancying way," I whisper, barely able to form the words.

"And what about Albus?"

"It's so different and I've got it all confused," I open my eyes, my head still spinning, and a certain glint in my grandmother's eyes tells me all I need to know. Am I that easy to read? "He's the one who makes my... my heart race. He's the one that I need so much it hurts, and I can barely think straight around him sometimes and it's because I l-"

She nods. It's just a nod, but it's everything I needed to hear. To see. Just what I needed to finally get out what I really want to say.

"Because I love him," A strangled sob chokes my throat as a grin splits over my face, "Because I love him a lot... and I'm a stupid idiot for not realizing it. Oh... he kissed me and I-" I'm interrupted by a small bout of laughter.

"I'm so sorry..." my grandmother tells me with a thin smile, shoulder still shaking in silent laughter, "This just reminds me so much of your father and Astoria. He refused to admit he had fallen for her, even though it was so obvious he was head over heels," I blink away tears at the mention of my mother.

"They were perfect for each other though... right?"

"Right," she agrees with a wistful glance. My grandmother squeezes my hand and stands up, waist-length white hair swishing behind her. "Now.... are you going to tell your father about this?"