Oblivion -ATEEZ WOOYOUNG-

Tacenda

~Flashback~

Wooyoung P.O.V

"Haewon.Come on let's go home." I said to her while she was packing her bag.
"Did I forget to tell you? I have to practice today.The competition is coming near.
"Really?That's great can we go together? You know how much I love watching you dance."
She giggled and walked out.
"Are you sure? You must be tired and I will be practicing for a while."
"That's ok.Let's go."

She looked so beautiful..I loved watching her dance.
She looked so happy and was so absorbed in her dancing, that she wouldn't even notice me.Her movements were so mesmerizing.
"I hope she never stops dancing." After a while my eyelids got heavy and I fell asleep.

Haewon P.O.V

"I think it's enough for today." I turned off the music and wiped away the sweat with my towel.
"Wait.Omg I totally forgot about Wooyoung." I turned around and...he was still here asleep.
I bended down and looked at him.
"I thought you already left." I was so happy seeing him.I was tired but because of him I feel like I could continue."
I brushed his hair out of his face and he slowly started to wake up.
"Are you done?" He asked half asleep.
"I am but why didn't you go home?"
"I wanted to go together with you.I knew you would practice until late.It's already dark outside.I will take you home."

"Wait then. I will go change."
"Take your time and take a shower."
"I can shower at home."
"You don't have to do that because of me."
"No it's because there is only cold water here." I lied.

We went home together while I tried keeping distance.I hope I don't smell like sweat that much.
"You don't need to keep a distance.It's normal that you sweat."
"Well I didn't want you to feel disgusted."
"I am not so come closer." I smiled.

"Can you do me a favor?" He asked.
"What?"
"Never stop dancing.You look so happy and free while dancing."
I smiled.
"Don't worry about that. I love ballet more than anything in the world.My dream is to become the best ballerina in this country."
"I am relieved.I am totally sure you will achieve your dream."
"I hope so too.You know there is a saying...A ballerina dies twice.Once when they stop dancing and once when they stop breathing...I will only die once." I said confidently.

We arrived at my house.
"Then see you tomorrow." Wooyoung said.
"Wait Wooyoung. I have something to tell you."
"What is it?"
"Not now...I will tell you on the day of my competition."
"Alright.I will wait." He smiled.
"Haewon.Hurry up and come in." My parents said waiting at the door.They weren't really happy to see Wooyoung.
"Go now Wooyoung, see you tomorrow." I said and rushed inside....

~present~

Haewon P.O.V

I was so torn about what to do.My head feels like its breaking.
"I need to visit the doctor." My sleeping disorder got worse.I need my medicine.

"Don't worry about me Haewon.It's ok I don't need Wooyoung.He doesn't know what you went through.Just forget all of this you don't need to enter that club."
I thought about Haru's words.But he needs him.I need to help him.
I need to go the doctor first.I need medicine before I can decide anything.

I called Hani.
"Hani? I will visit the doctor today.Can you tell the teacher that I will come later."
"Is everything ok?"
"I am ok don't worry.I just had a appointment that I forgot about."
"Alright.See you later."

I took my bag and and went out.

"Miss Park? You can enter room 2." I walked towards the door and was hesistant about entering.I thought I don't need to come here anymore.

I openned the door and the doctor widened his eyes.
"Haewon.."
"Hi doctor."
"Oh god please enter."
"It's been a long time."
"I really hoped that I don't need to see you anymore.." he said and I smiled.
"That hurts.You didn't want to see me again?"
"You know what I mean."

"So why are you here?"
"I....met him."
"What? I thought he is in america."
"I thought so too...that's why I went to the reunion, but I was wrong."
"So how did you feel meeting him?"
"At first...I thought I am ok.I could look at him and talk to him like nothing happenend.But after some time, he started reminding me of the past.I even had a panic attack.

"Did you have medicine left?"
"I had some left yes.But I need more."
"What about right now.When you see or think about him how do you feel?"
"It's complicated.I loved seeing him again.I can't look away he still makes my heart race,but I know I shouldn't be like that.I can't do that to Haru who was there for me all these years.He loves me so much but I can't get myself to say that I love him.Everytime when I want to say it, Wooyoungs face appears in front of me. I thought I had forgotten him,but the truth is he was always on my mind."

"That means you still have feelings left for him."
"Maybe.But still I will never leave Haru.I can't do that to him.It's just I want to erase all those memories.At some times I think about how nice it would be if I never met Wooyoung.Maybe it wouldn't hurt that much."

"You are denying your feelings.You love Wooyoung but you want to suppress your feelings, you want to erase him in your memories.You feel apologetic towards Haru."
"That's funny.Wooyoung said the same thing.He says I want to join to the ballet club but I am lying to myself that I don't want to.I hate that he is right...."

"You need to overcome your fears Haewon.You need to face your fears.Enter that club, no one is telling you to stop your studies and become a ballerina.Think of it as a hobby."
"I am afraid....that when I start, I won't be able to stop." I started crying.I am a mess right now.
"You won't know until you do it.Enter the club and look for yourself.You have to start listening to your heart and not your head."

"You are right that I feel apologetic to Haru...I still have feelings for Wooyoung, that's why I will enter that club.If that's the only way I can help Haru."
"Haewon your fears are one thing.But your feelings towards these peoples, you need to be honest about it."

"I don't know if I will be able to do that."
"That's ok.You made a small step and that's enough for now.You have to make these small steps to move forward and I will help you." He held my hand.I was so thankful to him he was like a friend to me."

"Thanks Seonghwa, I can only talk to you about it. I could never talk to Haru or Wooyoung about it.These things are better left unsaid...and now give me my drugs." I laughed and he also smiled.

I left the hospital with my medicine and breathed out.
"Now or never, let's do it Haewon."

Tacenda: things better left unsaid; matters to be passed over in silence.

🌸I woke up today and saw that many more people read my story and it made me so happy 😆. I hope you all liked this chapter too it's a little bit long but I hope you guys read till the end. See you next time.🌸