Janto - One shots -Time will heal all wounds.

Last Kiss

Ianto POV

'Jack.' Owen said.

'Are we including non-human life forms?' Jack says with that sarcastic smile he always has on his face. I feel the anger rising inside of me for two reasons. One because I'm almost sure that the last person he kissed was me and I'm not a non-human life form as far as I'm aware. Two because he killed the last person I kissed - Lisa.

'No, you haven't.' Gwen says almost shocked despite the fact that they all know it could be very true the last person Jack kissed before me was probably a non-human life form.

'You are a sick man, Harkness, and it is disgusting.' Owen says almost spitting his drink over everyone in disgust.

'I never know when he is joking.' Gwen says. I clearly know him better because I always know when Jack is joking this is clearly one of those times.

'So, my turn is it?' I say flatly purposely trying to ruin the mood. Maybe for one moment they might feel how I do. They might feel as empty as I do. They might feel as broken as I do. The laughter and smiles from the others stop instantly. 'It was Lisa.' Jack looks away from me like he can't even stand to look at me, like he can't even stand the sight of the person he kissed. I don't think he planned for things to turn out the way they did but they did and there is nothing anyone can do about it.

We sit there in the uncomfortable until Gwen breaks it. 'Ianto I'm sorry.' Gwen says. I can actually see it in her eyes that she feels bad about it. Which is strange sadness being something that I have never seen from herb before. Not for me anyway.

'Sorry she is dead or sorry you mentioned it.'

'I just didn't think.' We all knew Gwen was clearly not thinking. Gwen never thinks about anything unless who is going into her pants. Which clearly wasn't thinking because the answer is just everybody and anybody that wants to venture in.

'You forgot.' I say knowing that everyone will hate me but most of them hate me anyway so what's the point in trying to make friends with people who hate you.

Jack glares at me out of the corner of his eye. I know what he is thinking but that's not the point. I'm not going to sit here and admit to all of them that whilst my cyber girlfriend was trying to kill them that Jack was giving me mouth to mouth and it turned out to be a kiss instead as that would be ludicrous.

'We should get some firewood.' Owen says clearly trying to get out of this awkward situation. Owen likes creating tension but doesn't like to be caught in it. Me and Jack just look at each other, a mixture of anger across his face and a mixture of fear, sadness and shame painted across mine. I wasn't trying to be mean. I just can't believe myself that I am actually in love with my boss let alone that my boss is a man. And I just don't know if I am ready to broadcast that to the world.

Jack POV

Why would he say that the last person he kissed was Lisa? When it was me or at least I think it was. I had to look away when Ianto said it. I was disgusted by my actions that day, not his. I could never be disgusted by him. How couldn't I sit there snogging him whilst his girlfriend was trying to kill us all. And in actual fact I was only trying to give him mouth to mouth and I really don't know what came over me. It's not very like me at all but there it is. Actually, scratch that, it is very like me and that's why I hate myself sometimes I just can't help making a mountain out of a mole hill and it is stupid. I get that Ianto doesn't want to admit it to everyone but at least he could admit it to me. I've been thinking about how to ask him out for months and I guess I was there and decided that it could be a kiss if he wanted it to be or mouth to mouth. It's his choice and I wasn't going to make a big deal out of it. Well I can see he has made his choice very clear. I was trying to save his life, not get a relationship or anything out of it. I assume he was in shock and doesn't remember it. A lot happened to him that night. Or is he ashamed of me? Does he remember but doesn't feel the same. Is that why he won't look me in the eye. That makes so much sense now. Why did I do that couldn't I have just controlled myself. All I wanted to do was save him like the many times he had saved me. Just once I wanted to do a nice thing for him and instead I turned it into a complete mess.

Ianto POV

I walk back to the SUV to get the rest of the luggage out as Tosh is finishing putting up Owen's tent. I need to talk to Jack. I need him to know why I said what I said. I'm not ashamed of him. I really don't want him to think that. I love him. Why would I be ashamed of the person I love most in this world. I'm ashamed of myself. How I could let myself be drawn into somebody that doesn't love me back. That doesn't really want me. I know it was only a spur of the moment thing. It means nothing. It's not like anything has happened since anyway. Except when I bring him coffee in his office, he always makes the conversation last a little longer than it used to, he must just be trying to decide if I'm going to try and get them all killed again. But that will just be Jack flirting as usual. I see Jack approaching. I decide to let him talk first before I start blabbering. I need to know how he feels before I pour my heart out on the floor.

'Are we ok Ianto?' He says without his signature smile. I can tell this is a conversation that I am not going to enjoy.

'L -look S-sir.' I say, stumbling over my words.

'If we aren't then all you need to do is tell me I won't be bothered or make it difficult for you. I just need to know where we stand. I need to know if we are anything or if we are going to be anything. I just want answers.

'I understand that you just want answers but -.'I say trying to not let him cut me off.

'Do you? Because you don't seem to be talking to me and you are avoiding me, so I think I just got my answer.' Jack says as he begins to leave. I grab his arm to pull him back towards me.

'Jack please don't go. I need you. I need you more than you could ever know. This is new and different to me. I didn't know how to react. One minute I'm unconscious and then the next I'm kissing my boss. You know I'm a private person and I didn't want the whole group talking about us. I just kept convincing myself that you didn't need me or want me nearly as much as I want or need you. You mean so much to me. I don't think I have never loved anybody more. Certainly not a man and certainly not my boss but-.' I never got to finish my sentence because he crashed his lips onto mine. Both of us lightly shocked at what had actually happened. But we both relaxed into it. It was slow and passionate, not the usual rough and tumble that Jack goes for. Jack broke the kiss for air. 'I love you too. I never realised you felt that way or I would have done something sooner. I will always want to fight for us, and I know that whatever life throws at us I know we'll make it to the other side because that is what lovers do.' I saw something on Jack's face that I had never seen before and it was regret. He always seemed so happy but now he seemed to regret his actions. I know that a person who has lived for over 150 years must have many regrets, but Jack never let them show until now. Until me. 'I don't regret what I did. The only thing I regret was not doing it sooner. That's why I thought you had chosen to forget about it. I didn't ask you because I assumed there was never going to be an us. I don't make a habit of falling in love with straight co-workers.'

'Captain Jack Harkness, we are going to have to work on that label aren't we.'

'You 21st century people are always so fascinated in making yourself fit in perfect little boxes aren't you.'