Belle Ame: A Beautiful Soul (DS Auxiliary)

Chapter Eleven (Part 3)

Chapter Eleven

(Part Three)

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JUNE 2007.

MARAMING beses pa naming pinagdiskusyunan ni Ibarra ang tungkol sa biglaang pagpapakasal niya kay Czarina. And no matter how much I try to convince him to separate from his wife—even threatening him about his inheritance—Ibarra can't be swayed.

Napakatigas nang paninindigan niyang tama ang pagpili niya sa babaeng iyon, at walang mali sa agaran niyang desisyon na magpakasal.

Sa ilang pagtatagpo ay lagi na kaming nagkakainitan ni Ibarra dahil sa asawa niya.

Until Aya rebuked me.

"Santino, give Bari a break. Tinigilan mo na ang pagsisimula ng mga pagtatalo niyo dahil lang masama pa rin ang loob mong hindi ka inimbita sa kasal nila."

"Aya, hindi iyon—"

"Iyon talaga ang ipinuputok ng butsi mo. Stop being a baby about it, please. Haven't you realized yet why Bari did that? Because this! You're not calm about it!"

Natahimik ako. Minsan lang sumisigaw ang asawa ko. And when she does, it means she's freaking serious about it.

Huminga nang malalim si Aya. Pumikit ng ilang segundo. Pagkuwa'y lumapit siya sa'kin at hinawakan ang magkabilang braso ko. "Santino, you already have a personal relationship with Christ. Don't let it be stolen from you. Protect it."

Napakurap ako. I don't sure that I understand what she's saying...

Hinuli niya ang mga mata ko. "I know it's frustrating that things do not go the way you want it to be. It hurts that the people you love most left you out... But take a pause, Santi, and talk to God. You've been slowly breaking your walls. Don't start building a new one..."

Napayuko ako. "I just want to protect my son... Hindi ako mapalagay sa babaeng iyon."

"Stop referring to your daughter-in-law like that. Santino, we gained a daughter. Kung titignan mo si Czarina bilang anak, baka magbago ang pananaw mo sa kanya..."

Pinili kong manahimik sa nakalipas na mga linggo pagkatapos.

Naisip ko, may punto si Aya—just the part of giving Ibarra a break. If I wanted to slowly show my affection towards him, I should learn to shut my mouth. Para hindi na lang madagdagan ang atraso ko sa panganay ko.

Oh, God, teach me!

Bakit ba nang nagsimula na 'kong maniwala ulit sa Diyos ay tila mas humirap ang sitwasyon ko?

Hindi pa rin nawawala ang hindi ko mapakaling pakiramdam kay Czarina. Though, I learned how to control it a little bit. It didn't bother me that much. Yet, it never left my system.

Nakatulong siguro na mas naging abala ako sa pag-aayos ng lahat ng ari-ariang maiiwan ko. Hinahanda ko na ngayon habang ramdam kong malakas pa 'ko. Traydor pa man din ang sakit ko.

I was travelling in and out of the country to check the condition of some of my properties and assets.

Because of this, I missed a lot of Bible reading and prayer time. Hindi ko na rin nasasamahan si Aya sa Sunday services.

I was not able to attend the weekly gathering in Philip's house, too. Kaya't nangungulit na namang madalas si Carlitos sa tawag.

Kalahating taon na agad ang lumipas... I have to talk to my three children together, the lawyer and my wife advised.