Dear Seed,

Seed 19.5

I woke up a little earlier this morning. I wonder, when you dream, are we making love? Iyan kasi ang nakikita kong ngiti mo when we become one. I cannot wait till you wake up and feel that skin against me.

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Isa ito sa sulat na maaaring hindi na sa iyo makarating. I don't usually talk about my feeling, with you or with anyone. But this time I will, for a time will come na you'll have so many questions and I try to see to it that you will be answered.

To my dream girl,

                        The first time I saw you, I already know that you're lost. Like lost na hindi ka mula sa mundong ito, na probably you belong somehere, somewhat so close to being hell. I was staring blankly at you're back when you're trying to insert the coins at the machine and you're doing it for i don't know, 20 minutes?, to be honest it was a bit satisfying to just stare at you, how bad I wish the time froze at that very moment. Humaba na ang pila sa likod mo. I was in a hurry that time too, but I wanted to meet you, hindi tama ang araw dahil sa bitwin lang ako madalas siniswerte. I look up and there were no skies to be seen, hihiling sana ako kay bestfriend na ibigay na sa akin ang moment na yun, but I did anyway, maybe he was busy listening to you na lumusot at tanggapin na ang mga coins mong dala. I cannot and I will never ever forget the first time that I saw you. And God made me do what you asked for, I, for a minute became a hero to you.

I wanted to look back nung iniwan na kita, pero malakas ang pakiramdam ko na nakatingin ka rin sa akin at nahihiya ako. I was around, maraming beses, masasabi mo siguro na para mo akong stalker. I remember the night when I waited for you outside your office, so I can just look at you and follow you hanggang sa makasakay ka pauwi and just you know, make sure you're safe. I know I may sound creepy but I did it, many many times. And just always hope na gawa iyon ng destiny, tadhana.. because girls, you believe that do you? Isa lang ang alam kong nagdadala sa akin ng swerte, ang dahilan din kung bakit andito ka. 

Sa marami kong beses na pagmamasid sayo, lagi kong napapansin na malalim ang iniisip mo palagi. Kailan kaya ako magiging laman ng isip mo? Ang sarap siguro kung sa isang araw ay wala kang ibang maisip kundi ako lang. That night, I tried so hard to stop myself na yakapin ka at titigan ang mukha mo. I try to do it all the time, at yun ang matitinding oras na kailangan kong pag-aralan. How can you just stare at someone so beautiful without ever wanting to touch her hair? look so deep into her eyes, hold her hands and never let it go. You have no Idea what your face could do to me.

I was so thankful that night, kinausap ko siya. Alam ko na walang impossible sa Diyos, you ask for it with all your heart and viola, Hindi ako nagkamali. Remember when I told you na hahanapin kita? I don't look for you, I don't. You just happened to be there, anywhere kung nasaan man ako. Do I believe in destiny now? I still don't, it was all his doings and I'm forever grateful.

Cy, people will lie to you sometimes at iyon ang pinakamasakit na pwedeng gawin sa iyo ng tao. more worse than breaking your heart because it can be fixed, trust? I don't know. Unfortunately, I'm one of them. I love you so much that I have to lie, because I don't want to hurt you. I know I told you before na sabihin mo sa akin ang lahat dahil ayokong nahihirapan ka sa pagtatago, same with what I am doing for you now. Hurting you is the last thing I'd do. for your good.

You have to understand that people come and go. People will make promises and break them. Let your words be your strongest bond. Don't be like the people you hate. and always remember even if there is no hope left, lagi mong tatandaan ang mga sinasabi ko sayo. The only promise that I can't keep is that I will never leave you because one day or another, eventually I will. But I will return, maybe in other form. another heart, another soul. Because there is just one love, and it will always look for it's home.

You are my home.

you know whenever I look at you, lalong tumitindi ang paghanga ko kay Bestfriend. How can He do something so perfect and just let it wander around. I would keep you in glass box and bring you anywhere with me If I were him. So beautiful and yet so empty, and then it hit me, i am the one responsible for whatever it is that God wants inside you. sounds dirty. :p

But really, malakas ang pakiramdam ko na ako ang iyong puso. 

Hangga't andito ako sa tabi mo, I will do whatever it takes to make you happy. to appreciate every smile, to wipe all the tears, to breathe hope in your heart. to watch you grow, to hold your hands, to kiss you, to embrace you, to give you every joy. To show you all the good things out of bad, i will be your eyes, your every step, I will always be here to guide you. To fiil your void. to understand, to laugh with, to sleep with and to wake up to. I will never try to be the man that you dream, because I know that I am. I wouldn't be here kung hindi ako ang taong para sayo. And I believe the same for me, you're my weakness and my strength. My failure because I know that I cannot be perfect for you. and My sucess, alam ko na kulang pa at marami ka pang gustong abutin na pangarap sa buhay mo. One day, when you no longer love me, I will be waiting until you do, again. We may go a thousand miles apart from each other, but my soul lives where you are. 

this, our love story.. ay walang katapusang paghahanap at pahihintay. Huwag ka lang sanang mapagod.

Tandaan mo...hangg....

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"Do you eat lobsters?..." tanong ni Seed habang tahimik ang paligid sa binabaynay naming dagat.

"Hm, hindi ko pa natry.." pagtataka kong sagot.

"hindi naman medyo awkward na first date yun right?" patingalan nyang tanong

OMEGASH AAYAIN NYA ATA AKO NG DATE!!! FIRST DATE NA ITOOOOO!!!!