Profile // A Spencer Reid Love Story

Chapter 29 // Ice to Fire

Chloe's POV.

"Chloe, I love you."

It took a good few seconds for me to fully register what Reid had just said in to my brain. A crush was one thing, but love? Even I wouldn't have guessed that. Did I love him too? God, it sounded so weird. The word love in general was never a word that I used or thought of often. Especially after Adam. I hadn't fallen in love in years, the feeling was almost foreign.

I turned around to face him, seeing him differently than I had before, when I didn't know that he had these feelings for me.

"Reid, you can't. We can't- it's not allowed." I said, even though I could practically recite Hotch's words verbatim about how it wasn't actually an enforced rule.

"Can we just... can we talk about this?" He asked, sounding noticeably quieter and less confident.

I sighed before making my way towards him, not able to tell if my entire body was shaking because of nerves, or because of the cold night time weather.

"If you're...in love with me, then why have you been treating me like shit up until today?" I asked, raising my voice.

Reid stayed silent for a while, looking extremely guilty. And that was exactly how he should've looked. The damn guy acted as if I didn't even exist for the past few weeks.

"I told you that I was sorry." He finally spoke.

"Yeah, right after you were almost killed in an explosion. If that hadn't happened, you and I both know that you would've continued to ignore me. While I was at home recovering from being punched and kicked multiple times, being smashed into mirrors, and being shot, you acted like you could care less! I want an explanation, Reid. Not a half-ass apology."

By the time I finished talking, I was 99% sure that steam was coming out of my ears and my face was completely red. I had finally gotten everything that I had been bottling up out and although it felt good, it brought back all of the hatred that I had felt for him during that time.

"When you were kidnapped, I thought that I would've never got to tell you that I...that I had feelings for you." Reid spoke up, now informing me on what he was about to say in that hospital room before storming out. "I was angry, Chloe. Not only at myself for being too shy to make a move, but also at you for making me fall in love with you. I knew that you'd never go for a guy like me, it's obvious. So I... I don't blame you if you don't feel the same way."

I didn't know how to react. I wanted to punch him for being angry at me, I wanted to hug him and let him know that he was definitely a guy that I'd go for, I wanted to get back in my car and leave him there and make him feel stupid for what he has put me through, I wanted to kiss him right then and there so that I could find out whether or not I felt the same way.

Whether it was fireworks, electricity, or butterflies. I wanted to feel something after being numb to love for the past few years.

Did I want to risk it, though? Did I want to risk our friendship for a relationship? If it didn't work out, we'd still have to work together. And like I had thought before, what if he eventually turned out to be like Adam? They seemed like polar opposites, but people can change from ice to fire in the blink of an eye.

I should've stayed there in that parking lot and I should've continued listening and talking to him and then maybe we could've tried to make it work, but I did what anyone with a past like mine would do, and I started to panic.

"I...I can't think about this right now. I'm sorry." I managed to choke out before turning around, walking quickly to my car, and driving away.

And, yeah, I realized that was a big mistake.