thirty day writing challenge #1 (nov 2019)

day 3: fairytale

"i can't take this anymore. i'm leaving."

"what about her?"

"what?"

"you can't just leave us like that! she's eight, for god's sake!"

"i don't care."

the door slammed.

daddy was gone.

"he'll be back, sweetie,"

mommy used to croon through tears she prayed i couldn't see

but i saw them

he never came back.

mommy told me i'd be as pretty as snow white when i grew up

she said i'd have a loving family, a beautiful life

when he left, i was scared, confused, lost

nowhere in my princess stories was there a part about a father leaving

it was then eight year old me decided

fairytales weren't real

love didn't exist

and even if it did, i wasn't meant to experience it

everyone says everything heals with time

the bite, the sting of betrayal didn't

they all say when you grow up, you'll mature and be less sensitive

i grew up the complete opposite

insecure, scared

of hurting others

of being hurt

so i built a wall as strong as brick and stone

guarded against feelings and people

because the less i knew what it was like to feel, the less i would have to deal

with the consequences

because i thought everything, happiness, laughter, surprise, excitement-

everything was going to end up ruined.

but then i met you.

you, you were a disturbance

you were difficult, unable to be understood

you tried every method you could to break through, break down my wall

and well

even though i looked unshakable on the outside,

inside still lived the young child who dreamt of love and unicorns and being a princess

and you reached her

you sat through every mess of tears

hugged me tight, promised to chase away my fears

you didn't care that i wasn't perfect or dreamy

you were just present - and took me for who i was - me

really, there was no sappiness or cheese

no wooing or begging or getting on knees

it was just two people, in sync and together

caring and reaching and accepting each other

you put the galaxies back in my eyes

told me maybe love wasn't all a story of lies

you nursed the hurting into wholeness and healed the scars

unlocked my heart and opened all the jars

with you, my feelings could no longer stay hidden

just cause they moved with an uncontrollable rhythm

i learnt to give them and myself a chance

i didn't need to fear them, i just had to learn how to dance

so i started off broken and lost

hated who i was

thought nothing i did mattered

thought i'd end up shattered

but bibbidi bobbidi boo

you swept me away with you

and now my favourite fairytale would have to be

the one of you and me

A/N: for a poem that i struggled with finding inspiration for, i'm pleasantly surprised by how it  turned out :)