Learn To Love Again {COMPLETED}

Chapter 3

Steven's P.O.V

A few days have long since past from my accident. The moment I realized I lost my arm, was the moment that I felt like my whole world fell apart. I don't blame Spinel at all for what happened, this was my choice and I had to live with that. Pearl, Amethyst, Garnet and even Lapis asked me if I could potentially use my healing powers, and regrow a limb. Trust me, I tried multiple times... Until it hurt like hell.

The damage of Spinel's injector was still lingering with that poison flowing through the ground. After all the feats I have accomplished in my life, this one didn't feel like an accomplishment. It felt like a failure of my mission to save the Earth. My home, and I couldn't even save it myself. Instead I give myself for a gem I hardly know who just a few days ago tried to murder me.

What an ironic turn of events huh? A defensive gem hybrid who can summon a shield, only had one arm to defend himself. Sure I could use my bubble or even my diamond abilities, but in the end I was still a liability to the team. I sit there in my bed, pondering while the gems were out helping everyone. But could I help? No, Steven Universe had to stay right in his bed and be useless. Just like I always was.

"What are you thinking about, Steven?" Spinel asked. She stayed with me most of the time, I told her it wasn't necessary for her to be here. But she wouldn't budge so I let it go.

I turn my head to look at her, she looks just as bad as me. Her hair is a complete mess with dark circles under her eyes. "Just everything, I suppose nothing in particular."

Her lips draw into a thin line, her gaze flickering over my cast. It's nothing special, just some overlapping layers of cloth that make me look like I was extra on that Tom Cruise's "The Mummy" movie. I can tell that Spinel still feels guilt about my missing appendage, even though I've told her on numerous occasions that it wasn't her fault. She won't let it go and I don't know if there's anything I can do to make her think otherwise. I can still try at least that though, because in a way, that's still an opportunity that I can use to help someone besides myself.

"Look, Spinel," I say, tenderly grabbing her shoulder. "I know that you blame yourself for this. I can see it in your eyes. It never fades away. Let me assure you right here right now that I made my choice. There's no way to turn back time and change what went down, but even if that was a possibility, I still would've gone through with saving you".

Spinel scooches closer to me, almost as close as to where our hips touch. This form of close contact is not unusual, she's done it more often these past few days, but I can't shake the feeling that there's some other kind of intention behind it besides general caregiving.

"I just don't know how you could forgive me after all I've done to your planet," Spinel teared up a little.

I just let out a gentle chuckle, "Spinel don't you see what my whole life revolved around?"

She raises a brow in confusion, "What do you mean?"

"The story of my life, a gem I didn't know was trying to kill me, I'm paying for the mistakes for my mother when it had nothing to do with me, and when the world is about to end, I can't even be useful. But, look what happened? I changed people, the one power I've always had. It's saved me on more than one occasion. Look at Lapis and Peridot, they both tried to kill me but I made them see Earth is the home they were meant for. Where they could start over and start a brand new life, a better life than the roles that were established for Homeworld."

"I guess I see what you mean," Spinel fidgets around uncomfortably. "Especially if the Diamonds are any example".

Right then, a rumbling much louder than thunder trembles the ground and reverberates through the air. The level of intensity is so high that I know what it belongs to. Ignoring Pearl's strict orders to stay in bed, I get up, don my pink jacket, and head downstairs, Spinel trailing behind me. After pushing the front door open and stepping onto the porch, I can see more clearly what I already expected.