Chapter 14- A Girl Like Bailey

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LISTEN TO THE SONG WHILE READING.

 B A I L E Y

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B A I L E Y

The last thirty minutes I've learned so far is that, Niall was a boy with dreams of becoming a doctor.Now, He turned into a boy with fallen dreams with a perfect practice of how to kiss a girl. Well-to me, it was like, "How to kiss a girl without her approval."

Now, fat girls like me doesn't really have much of good choices. And if we get something, someone like Niall, we end up being curious and try to feel what it was like to feel to actually kiss someone rather than kissing a pillow or your dog. We end up giving in.

I once went to a fat camp which my mum forced me to go. Just one of the thoughts of her that somehow, I would become the perfect image on her mind. There was this girl who was, weirdly, larger than me. Her name was Maisie with black jet hair at neck length and constellations of huge pimples and her height was just as large enough as her weight. One night at our bunk bed, after running the whole day and finding ways to lose some extra pounds, she asked me a question from under of the top of my bed while I was trying to sleep and said, "Bailey, what would you do if a good looking guy kisses you? Or, more specifically, wants you?"

Back then, I pretended to asleep because one, I was tired and two, this was a weird question to ask someone in midnight.

I regret that now.

River was kissing me and I gave in. Just like a fat girl with no good choices. No good options. Because when you get something or someone so perfect as Niall, you don't ask questions. I gave in, so much stupidly.

I won't say that kiss wasn't amazing. It was. But this was one of the "wrong things at wrong time" moments. I wasn't feeling anything. I was just moving my lips and swaying onto him and this feels like a work. Like, this is what I'm supposed to do. Fat Girls don't get this moment so often and when they do, you gotta seize the moment.

But I wasn't sure enough to seize the moment when this feels like a work.

Maybe- this feels like a work because I found out Niall faked his death and especially, because...well, he was sick of being the dork one with glasses. Maybe because he know he was broken and this was one of the solutions of him to just forget that he was ever broken. And sad.

Moreover, he didn't ask for my approval.

As I got back to reality, I shoved him away instantly and slapped him.

...♡...

"Ow! What was that for?"
"What's wrong with you?" I said, tears rolling down on my cheeks but I didn't care, "You...you lied to me. You said your name is River and...it's not. You literally faked your death and now what? You didn't expect me to melt in your arms this easily, did you?"

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