Chapter Eighteen

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I woke up to Tanner laying beside me in the hospital bed with Elena. There was a knock on the door. The doctor walked in, smiling. The doctor told me that the tests came back and that my other baby was in terrible condition. Then out of nowhere. I start my contractions. They felt worse than when I delivered Elena. I start yelling and crying. Tanner wakes up. "What's wrong?" "Your wife is going into labor." the doctor replied. Tanner called his family and my family to tell them that I was going into labor. Our family rushed to the hospital. Tanner gave my parents Elena and rushed into the delivery room with me.

I was in so much pain after they gave me the epidermic. Tanner held my hand and kept telling me to breathe. A nurse was on the other side of me keeping a cool, damp cloth on my head to make sure I don't overheat. After a few hard minutes of labor, I had pushed out my son.

The doctor asked me if I wanted to remove my other child as well, I said yes. My other baby was a boy as well. Two twin boys, except one was alive. My heart shattered as I held my lifeless baby. Tears rolled down my eyes as I hugged and kissed my sweet baby boy. We had names picked out for the both of them, Aiden Cole and Braxton James. As Tanner held Aiden, my eyes never left the sight of Braxton.

My family and Tanner's family came into my room to see Aiden and Braxton, they did not know that Braxton was born dead. I was surrounded with love and care in the room by our families. They had rushed Aiden to the NICU to run tests and to put him under a machine. They had nurses watch him constantly to make sure he wouldn't code. We had a nurse who would check on him constantly and come to our room to give us updates. The night before I was supposed to leave the hospital, I had fallen asleep from the tiredness of childbirth. Then all of a sudden, one of the nurses comes into the room. She looked like she had been crying. Her eyes were red and I could see tears coming from her eyes. "Aiden took his last breath an hour ago, we figured you would like to see him one last time." My heart was completely shattered. I lost both of my boys. I didn't want to live anymore. The heartbreak of losing not just one child, but two. I felt a sharp pain in my chest. I feel my breath start to disappear as if I didn't know how to breathe anymore. I was starting to see stars. I felt my eyes go back into my head and I started to shake. The nurse started yelling, "Grab the crash cart, she's coding!" A group of nurses rush in with a cart on wheels and they rip the hospital gown off of my chest to have room to put two metal handles on each side of my chest. They counted to three before I felt a shock in my body. They did this about three times before they heard a large gasp of air and my eyes open back. Tanner is in shock. I looked over at him and he is crying. He looked at me and held me. "I thought I lost you Allie, I can't lose you again." I started to cry. When I felt good enough to stand, Tanner and I walked down to the NICU to see our son. I could tell he wasn't alive anymore. He had cold purple skin and looked lifeless. I sat in a chair and they handed Aiden to me. He was smiling. When I saw his smile, I completely broke down. Tanner held onto me and I cried into his shirt. They took Aiden from me and that was the last time I saw him. I held onto Tanner and cried the rest of the night. The doctor told me that he was going to keep me in the hospital for a few extra days to run tests to make sure I was okay.

The doctor came back in within 3 hours. He told me that I had arrhythmias. He told me that I had abnormal heart rhythms and that is what caused me to go into cardiac arrest. I asked if I was okay to go home. The doctor told me that I had to at least stay over night to make sure I would be okay. The last night I was in that hospital bed, Tanner had crawled into the bed with me so I didn't feel alone while I slept. We both fell fast asleep. I woke up with Tanner still laying beside me in the hospital bed. One of the nurses came in to check on me. I told her that I was feeling alright. She signed my dismissal papers and we went home.

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