Just Breathe

Chapter 13 {Beg A Life}

"Riley? Riley?" 

It took a few more times of the therapist saying her name for her to fully come back to reality. She found herself drifting away more than usual lately, but she always found herself in the same place; with him. She would picture what he looked like or imagine the sound of his sweet voice whispering in her ear. He was her escape and she seemed to be escaping a lot lately. She shook her head and turned to look at the therapist who was sitting beside her as the rest of the therapy session was in a circle around her. Her arms tighten around her knees as her feet rested comfortably in the small chair. For some reason, she found it reassuring to ball herself up as small as possible when sitting down. She always did it and she wasn't quite sure why, she assumed it was the closest thing to literally disappearing. "What?" She turned to face the therapist, wanting nothing more than to go home and pick up the phone.

"Would you like to tell us how you have been feeling?"

"Oh...uh...fine, I guess." She spoke quickly and mumbled beneath her breath.

"I know it's difficult, Riley but would you be willing to let us in on the situation concerning your father? We're all friends here and I think a lot of your sad feelings towards life stem from the accident."

She could feel the tears rising in the back of her eyes with just the mention of her father and she buried her head in her knees. Jacob Reynolds was a good man, a great father and she was the reason why he wasn't there. She felt a hand on her back, rubbing it gently and she assumed it was the therapist but she didn't want to talk about her father. What about that didn't the therapist understand? Riley told her that from the start and she definitely didn't want to sit around and discuss her problems with a bunch of strangers. Just sitting in the room made her feel worse about life...living made her feel worse about life. She quickly lowered her knees and placed her feet on the floor before letting them carry her to the door quicker than wild fire. She had to get out of the room, she had to find a rush, a relief, something to numb the pain.

~ 

Jonathan was almost positive the grouchy lady from the front desk was becoming suspicious of his cleaning habits. He had been cleaning this exact same window every day he came in at exactly the same time. It was all for her, just so he could catch a glimpse of her beautiful face. He felt the door beside him swing open as the beautiful girl ran out of the therapy session with tears streaming down her face. His heart sank as he watched her run through the door leading up to the roof. 

"Shit." He mumbled to himself before dropping the rag in his hand and taking the steps up to the roof two at a time. He ran out onto the large empty roof and found her standing on the ledge. "Don't do it, Riley!" She turned around to look at him as the eyeliner she was wearing had smudged down the side of her cheeks from the tears. 

She chuckled bitterly. "You? What the hell do you want?" She groaned and threw her head back.

"I just want to help." He responded while making his way closer to her very slowly.

"There is no help! No one can help me! I am helpless and hopeless. I have no purpose and no reason to be here. Why do you care if I jump, anyways? Are you just trying out your hand at being a Good Samaritan or are you afraid you may have to be the one to clean my blood off the sidewalk?" 

"Just get off the ledge and we'll talk...please." His only option in those times with her was to beg. He had no other choice and he honestly didn't mind begging. If it would save her life, he would have begged until he was blue in the face.