In Real Life ✓

50. Still A Better Love Story Than Twilight

I slowly nodded in response to Eddie's question, apprehensive about the follow-up question. The audience was suddenly far too quiet. I wasn't necessarily uncomfortable talking about my sexuality, so there was no need to avoid the question, but I didn't know how much Eddie and the other guests knew about it. There was a big chance that I was going to have to explain it. Again. And I really just didn't feel like that doing that right now.

"Yeah, so when you mentioned it a while ago, I took some time to do some research, because I honestly didn't know much about it..."

Thank God.

"...and I can imagine not everyone here knows what it is either. Who knows?" He turned around to face the audience, of which about a third raised their hand, which was... honestly, more than I expected. But the other two thirds made him smile and exclaim, "Ha, we get to teach you something!"

Did he want to turn this into an educational moment?

But instead of asking the question, he asked, "Do you feel like you should be the one to bring topics like these to light?"

"Oh, uh, I..." I uttered, surprised by the sudden change of direction. "No, not really. I mean, I think it should definitely be normalized, but I don't think I'm qualified to teach anyone anything, you know? I'm no expert. I only have my own experience."

He nodded, as if to tell me to continue.

I took a moment to think of a way to formulate my thoughts, before continuing, "I don't experience physical attraction, but I do have romantic feelings, so I can only speak for people who are like me; asexual, but not aromantic. I think it's very important that people know about these things, so I'm not going to avoid talking about it, but I wouldn't really know how to explain everything. And I don't expect everyone to understand either. All I want is for people to... tolerate it, I guess."

"That's an interesting point you're making," Eddie mused as he scratched his chin. "When it comes to sexuality, most people speak of acceptance rather than tolerance."

"Yeah, which is totally understandable. You just want everyone to love you for who you are, right?" I replied, smiling wryly at the thought of all the triggered tumblrinas watching me and screaming internally. "But it's unrealistic. There will always be people out there who don't understand."

"I don't understand, to be honest," Mia admitted carefully. "I've never heard of aromantic."

Jacob surprised me by saying, "It's when you don't experience romantic attraction, right?"

I turned to look at him and nodded. "Right."

"So you wouldn't want to be a spokesperson for the LGBT community?" Eddie asked.

"Well..." I let out a little chuckle. "Not everyone agrees that asexual people are even a part of the LGBT community, actually, since it stands for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender. But it doesn't really matter if I belong or not. I have friends and family who do, so I will always be an ally, regardless. But I wouldn't consider myself to be a spokesperson, no. I'm just here for the memes."

The audience laughed, but before Eddie could continue with the interview, Mia leaned closer to me and said, "So you—Wait, sorry if this is a stupid question, but... Isn't it hard for you to find a partner who, uh... doesn't mind that you're not sexually attracted to them?"

I inhaled deeply and glanced at a particular boy in the front row, who was smiling at me unabashedly.

"I guess I was lucky."

"Oh, yes, have you two met Eve's boyfriend?" Eddie asked.

Jacob nodded, but Mia had been rather late, so we hadn't had to chance to speak before the show started. She grinned at me and asked, "I wish I had, but I guess I can meet him later. How long have you two been together? Oh, I'm sorry, Eddie, I'm taking over your show!"