Tough Love ✔️

Revelations of Realisations

The silence that followed almost killed you, it was so slow and spongey, like living in jelly, yet it was potently sharp and ominous and daring you to take a breath and question what had come to pass. To question the man who had broken into yours and Dean's house who had two alias's, apparently.

Coming back from the shock, your head turned to Dean faster than your pulse that had risen suddenly and you almost screamed, you were so confused. You just needed answers.

Honest to God answers.

"Chuck? As in the prophet, that guy who wrote those books about you guys?"

"That guy, yeah," Dean confirmed.

You froze, a realisation washing over you very quickly,"Chuck Shurley wasn't real, was he?" You interrogated the cowering curly haired man in the lounge room. "Chuck, he wasn't a real person, because you're God - you're Him! I know this, I talked to you!" you accused him, the rage coming to you like the ocean slamming against a cliff side. "And -,"

"Chuck wasn't real?" Dean frowned, lowering the angel blade. "You're -,"

"Chuck is a real person, Dean, ______," the curly haired man raised his palms in a non threatening way away from himself. "I'm sort of...I'm using him as a vessel. He's me. I made him. He's a real person."

Dean snorted. "And it was you all the time? Like, since Sam and I met you? God?"

"Yeah," he admitted.

"Joshua was right, you were on Earth." He nodded. "This weird crap is starting to make sense for a change."

"Can we not do the soul-searchy wishful thinking moments just yet, Dean?" You snapped, "God has broken into our house, and he wanted to speak to us, like Cas said." You turned to God. "I thought I made myself clear, Dean and I, we don't want to speak to you. About anything."

God looked down, and you could tell he felt a bit ashamed for B&E. "It is written in your fate, ______; Dean: you're not supposed to be together. Horrible things'll happen -,"

Dean laughed. "Horrible things already happen, we're hunters. It's more than an occupational hazard."

You didn't move.

Not supposed to be together. Horrible things. Fate. Not supposed to be -

"_______? Babe, are you alright?"

You suddenly felt faint - something that never happened, never. Unless there was deathly amount of blood loss, you never got light headed.

You shook your head vigorously but immediately regretted it: suddenly your vision was blurry and slowly, you walked to the kitchen table, and sat down heavily, head between knees.

Breathe, ______, you told yourself. Just breathe.

No, no, no.

It was coming back to you, slowly washing over you like sinking into and under a running bath.

That god-awful dream, that terrible nightmare that had you and Dean and Sam had been in so much pain and no, no, no, no, you shouldn't be remembering a dream in such detail! It had been in your head, pictures in your brain -

"What have you done to her?" you heard Dean growl to God.

"She's remembering."

Then the facts hit you:

Your name was ______ ______. Your family died by a Rugaru, then came back as ghost possession and tried to kill you after, they were so pissed off at their death and you for not saving them. You were practically raised by Bobby Singer and learned all about hunting from him and Ellen and Jo. You met Dean Winchester and his brother in a diner, and worked with them for the first time to kill off a covey of vamps. Then you'd gone back to Bobby's place, alone -

- no you didn't you didn't. You went on to work with them -

and then bored beyond recognition after hours of research for no cause but memory you baked pies and snuck onto a hunt at midnight and got hospitalised after the demons cut you up pretty bad

- where was this coming from, you shouldn't remember dreams like this, you'd never been to a goddamned hospital in your life as a hunter, ever -

and then you fell completely and hopelessly in love and then left Dean before he was to be dragged to hell but you came back and watched the light fade from his eyes and you developed the prophetic headaches and started seeing glimpses of the future and you went to Sam for help because it was killing you softly, Dean being dead but he wasn't and Dean came back and you

- oh God oh God oh God oh God make it stop make it stop make it stop! -

Fast forward and his little brother Sam fell in the cage, pulling down Adam, the other one...and the there was the pregnancy test

- what? This keeps getting crazier! -

and God, the man upstairs, that guy you got the first dream of, the guy in your living room, he woke you up. From all of it. It wasn't a dream, ______. It wasn't a dream.

"It was real, the whole damn thing, all of it happened, it did," you gasped, the world still spinning in your head. "It all happened."

"What happened?" Dean growled.

"That wasn't a dream," God explained.

"I know, now," you retorted with the sass you'd picked up from Bobby, "Holy shit," you breathed, feeling the urge to puke come into you.

"The nightmare that ______ had, after your first hunt, was what really happened."