Safe and Sound [h. styles]

➴ estella's letter.

01 June, 2024

My Beloved Harry --
Hopefully you have came across this letter closely to my death date. I didn't know when I was going to surrender, but if you're reading this without me physically by your side, than I'm already gone.
Harry, my Harry. Do not fear for the future, do not think that you cannot continue the beautiful life we made together, and the beautiful life that our love created. You need to be there for our little Rosalie, and mold her into a loving young lady, becoming better than I ever was. I want you to teach her the meaning of life; whatever it means in your perspective, darling. To not take it for granted, yet remind her that she will find herself taking it for granted at times.

Remind her to fight for what she loves when she feels it is right. If she ever settles on someone who is stubborn, afraid to love and admit it, tell her to fight for him, or her. Don't leave her alone, Harold. She'll always be your daddys little girl but if she comes out saying she's not on the "boy" wagon, support her. If she's happy then you should be happy.

Harry Edward Styles. The love of my small life span. What would I have done without you? Perhaps I would have cried my life away, isolating myself from the ones who tried surrounding me with love. I would have taken the shots, and gone through chemo not caring if I died right then. But you my love, came into my life like a damn bird swooping up its pray; Unexpectedly, abruptly.

And I cannot tell you how happy I was for that. How happy I am for that. You are the sweetest man I have ever met in my life. A man who didn't care being seen with someone bald and scrawny-like. You just took my hand and dragged me into the adventure that's called life. I ran out of fuel and you came running, filling my tank back up and igniting something different in me. I had finally realized I had something to care about; you.

Not only did I have to care about you, but I had to care about where I was going in life. I had spent decades crying, wasting the precious time I had in my hands, drowning myself in depression, paying no attention to what I had been doing to those around me; shutting them out.

Harry when I met you I was bursting with delight. And as we spent more time with eachother, I became deeply in love with you. You had this effect on me, Harry and I couldn't just shake it off. It stayed with me, the warmth I felt around you was a feeling that I loved. And that day when you asked me out, I couldn't have felt anymore happier. I know it was only a week since we had met, but we honestly created a strong bond in such a short time. I remember my mum telling me not to get my hopes up, not to begin thinking we'd get married and have kids. Look where we are now. Married.. A family.. A happy family.

Staring at you would have me at my knees. You are beautiful, handsome.. Sexy. You have intrigued me since then, Styles. Your eyes are beautiful, and I am so sure Rosalie will definitely have those beautiful piercing irises you have and chocolate locks of hair. I am sure you will be the best father a girl can have. I love you Harry, but please don't spoil our little girl. I know you so well, Styles, and I know you will be buying her everything she wants but please don't do that. It cannot go to the extent where she cries in the Barbie aisle because you aren't so fond of purchasing a two-hundred dollar Barbie doll, (although something tells me you won't care.)

I give you my blessing to date other people. It's only right. It's what you deserve. I want Rosalie to have that mummy figure, not just a daddy figure. And I know you can do both, but I'm so sure that you'll freak out when our daugther comes running with tampons that she got from a girl in school, asking you to teach her how to insert it. (If that event occurs, please don't agree. Harry, if losing my virginity to you was painful at first, -- don't worry, you didn't hurt me, darling -- then a tampon will definately hurt. Tell her to use a pad and look it up on Youtube or something.)

I want you to find someone. You can't be single all your life. But please don't use women to please yourself, honey. It's wrong, and you'll only destroy them. Find a lady who can give you what I couldn't; an everlasting love.

To me my love for you is everlasting. For you, who knows. Please forgive me if I am wrong, Harry.
I love you, so much. And I don't want you to forget that. Harry, there's a box in the closet. A brown photograph box. In there, there's letters. Letters to Rosalie, and letters to you. Read one for whenever you're feeling something and want me to coax you. Read one to Rosalie when she needs her mums advice, a reminder that I love her, and when she turns ten, fifteen, eighteen, and so on.
The instructions are already in the box.

Truthfully, I'm not exactly ready to die. I still can't accept the fact that my life has come to an end.. I had always thought about death before I met you, wondering what life would be if I weren't here. Would I be a constellation amongst the twilight sky, or would I be bird in a tree roaming along the midst of the world? I don't want to go, I want to live here, with you and Rosalie.. But I have to accept it, and you have to accept it too, so please.. Accept it.

You are my everlasting love. You are the love of my life. My baby, my husband, my best friend. I won't forget the way you smell, so addicting like the way nicotine is to smokers. The way your speech is slow, and beautiful. The expressions you make when you're pained, happy, and angry. The lust in your eyes, and the happiness in your eyes. The way you play with your lips when you get nervous, and the way you run your hands through your hair when your pacing. The dimples that pop when you smile a true smile, you're head being thrown back as you screw your eyes shut, dying of laughter.

I will always love you, don't forget that. You are my number one, my superman. Stay with Rosalie, don't attempt to do anything stupid. I want to see you and hear loads of stories of how she grew up, of her first heart breaks and such. Do what you want, it's your life and Rosalies. Do the good, but never forget me. Our love was like a fairytale only written in my perception. I had a promising life with you, shedding tears and roaring with laugther. I love you Harry Edward Styles, and do not fear, for we will meet again some day. I am now at peace, I'm now safe and sound.

-- Estella Rose Styles