2. Luke, Alex & Haley Dunphy

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Phil: Those drops are really hanging on. I'm like Han Solo when he came out of the carbonite. Nothing?
Alex: I get it. Star Trek.
Phil: You're breaking my heart.

Haley: I was conceived at a Duran Duran concert?!
Alex: Classy start to a classy life.


"That's a library? I thought it was a church for a religion that didn't allow makeup." -Haley

Haley: Lily what did I just say?
Lily: I don't know, something about shoes probably.

"This country's number one export is hot surfers. I'm not gonna buy the first one I see, I'm still browsing." -Haley


"C'mon we gotta go! That party's full of sophomores. Those women have lived." -Luke

"Ew it's so sad when parents try. My mom double pierced one of her ears and I'm like "Hello! You're 50." -Alex

"I've been lonely. Having a mirror in my room will be like having company." -Haley


Haley: Oh my God I'm missing a text.
Alex: It just got real didn't it?

"Should you be more worried that Haley has a nurse's uniform in her closet?" -Alex

"Look, I have no problem drinking. I can literally do it standing on my head. But A ,not with my parents. Plus also I needed to stay sharp because they were obviously up to something and I was in no mood. I barely got 10 hours of sleep last night." -Haley

Luke: It's called growing up and having your own interests. Like the minister's daughter in your precious Footloose.
Phil: Wow, using my own movie against me. Let's hear it for the boy.


Alex: Am I just going to nitpick everyone until they leave me?
Haley: Hey mom found somebody!

"Dad I was with you on the tight rope, I was your wingman at the wing eating competition, but I'm not feeling this one. You're missing Christmas Eve." Luke

"I got problems of my own. I can't always be the lovable sidekick on the Manny how" -Luke

Haley: Don't dark up our room

Alex: Don't slut up your college.

"On one hand, i have to pick up garbage all day. On the other, look at me in orange!" -Haley

"Oh relax, i'm sure you guys will find a couple who wants to get with you." -Haley

"How surprised should we be? I mean he's basically a hyperactive toddler who just wants to play all the time" -Alex

"It's a body spray called Sex Grenade. One of the divorced dad's in the hotel recommended it." -Luke

Claire: Haley I need the wifi corner get down.
Haley: Ugh! I need Instagram to know there's still beauty in the world!

"With great hotness comes great responsibility." - Haley

Claire: This cold stops with me. Why do you think I swapped beds with Luke last night?
Phil: You did?
Luke: Appreciated the back rub. Not sure I loved being called Miss Thang.
Phil: Nooooo!

"Okay you need to calm down. This college tour, not Oprah's favorite things" -Alex

Claire: Check this out, a reflecting pond.
Alex: Great maybe you can see how crazy you're being right now.

Luke: Move!
Haley: You have plenty of room!
Luke: No, move out. You're 40!

"Wait is fire weather?" -Haley

"Phil: He seems like a real go-getter huh?

Haley: Why cause he goes and gets things?"

"Okay that's a lot of mirror looking and that's me saying that." -Haley

Haley: I'm Alex, who are you?
Andy: I'm their manny.
Haley: Nice try, I know their Manny and you look nothing like him.
Andy: Ohhh, you're Haley.

"She's so new to our school, she doesn't even realize that I'm a full social class below her. " -Alex

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