ITALIAN MOON EDWARDS POV

chapter 2

Chapter 2

As I ran through the forest away from my Bella towards home I tried to make excuses to stay but I knew deep down that my world would one day kill my true love. In less than a year we had been together three times had my world nearly taken her life firstly being myself when she first arrived I wanted to devour her it took hundred years of self control to stop me, then James tried to take her from me and yes I should have left at both those points but I wasn't strong enough to leave her I kept telling myself I was her protector and my love was strong enough to keep her alive. Now when one of my own family had tried to take a snap at her I realised no matter how much I loved her I really couldn't protect her.

When I got back the house was empty Alice and Jasper had already gone up to Denali the morning after the incident and Esme, Carlisle , Rose and Emmett gone to Denali earlier in the day after begging me to reconsider Esme was practically on her knees of course I knew I had to stand my ground but loving Bella the way I did I was very nearly swayed. Esme had the best intentions though she had seen how truly I had been changed by my love for Bella I was always so sure of myself thinking I was complete that's until I met Bella she changed everything for the better or worse for her.

I grabbed my stuff that had been left by the door and threw it in the Volvo my quiet sanctuary my Volvo, as I turned the keys I wondered what devastation I had left behind I knew Charlie would take care of Bella and after a few weeks she would be back to normal and she would be ok I hoped. I wondered though where was she now ? Was she crying ? Was she brushing me off already wondering what she had seen in me? It killed me not to know I almost drove past her house to see if I could see anything but I knew if I drove that way i would never leave one look at her crying would break my resolve and I would stay and I knew that wasn't in Bella's best interests so I drove straight to Denali.

It was shorter trip than usual I drove faster than usual I needed to concentrate on the road not Bella harder than I ever imagined I could smell her in the car imagine her next to me he long brown silky hair that always smelled of strawberries her hand on mine her face smiling at me oh why was I torturing myself like this why don't I just turn around go back to forks and change her why why why of course I knew why, I love her and I didn't want to damn her or change her in anyway Bella was the most beautiful human I had ever encountered she was selfless an kind and so good it hurt to know how much distance I had put between us I wanted to go back so bad my unbeating heart actually felt pain pain I cant describe but was causing me actual physical pain by being parted from her. Maybe I would use Tanya's phone to call and when she answered I would know by her tone how she was but I resisted I needed to leave her alone now and forever I suddenly shivered, the realisation of what I had done hit me I had left Bella for good I felt weak I felt dead for the first time ever I actually felt dead.