Gloaming

No more beauty

Authors note:
I hope y'all are enjoying the book so far! If not, I encourage you to checks out the book "it's okay to be scared" by victor_iaa  It's absolutely amazing!

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Cynthia's point of view
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I sit back on my bed and sigh deeply.

"What other books do you have?" I ask Octavia, she continues to read her novel.

"Go look in my backpack" she responds.

I quickly get off my bed and walk towards Octavia's backpack which is sitting by her bed.

It looks like a child's backpack from the walking dead.

It look grungy and muddy.

I start to dig through the teal backpack.

I then find something more value able than a novel.

A pair of scissors.

I quickly grab the scissors and put them in my pocket, hoping Octavia doesn't see.

I keep digging in an attempt to find another novel.

"The fault in our stars"

The pages are torn and the cover is folded, but I don't mind.

I grab the book and head back over to my bed.

After getting bored of the cheesy romance story the laid In between the beige pages of the book, I head over to the bathroom.

I look at myself once again.

I use to get comments like "you are so beautiful!" Or "how to you do your makeup"

I would respond with a thank you and say I didn't do my makeup, because the truth is, I have natural beauty.

Now trust me, it's not a gift.

I've been catcalled, assaulted, bullied, and used, all for being beautiful.

Sometimes I used to wish I could just not be noticed.

I would wish to be in the crowd that noticed people, but never actually noticed.

Right now I'm not sure if I'm grateful for that beauty, because under all the cuts and bruises, it's glows.

I can still see it, buried underneath.

But do I want to see it?

Maybe for confidence yes, but it will make me weaker, and vulnerable.

I grab the scissors and begin to saw at my dirty blonde hair, hair falling to the floor.

I snip away till it's nothing but a messy pixie cut.

I look at myself in the mirror once again.

No more beauty.