/ / R O B B E R S / / (Matty Healy/George Daniel)

And they're driving past my old school

George's statement was a lie, of course it was. Fuck - Matty might not even be alive if it wasn't for him, if he hadn't found him when he did.

Sometimes Matty forgot about his old life now that he was so immersed in his new one, but as he tried to ignore the hot spikes of pain shooting through his body, he allowed himself to recall the younger version of himself who was afraid of everything, who hid his bruises underneath countless layers even in July, of the boy who didn't think he was worthy of anything, especially not love.

That Matty wasn't anywhere near safe, or happy, or all of the things that George always said he wanted for him. He was miserable, and alone, and yes - Matty might have gotten hurt on this trip, but that didn't mean that it was George's fault.

If anything, it was his own. Matty loved the rush of stealing, of feeling powerful for a few moments when he had never imagined he could scare anyone into giving him anything no matter how hard he tried, which was most likely caused by baggage he was still carrying after suffering under his father's abuse for so long, but maybe that wasn't really important either.

Matty didn't really want to hurt anyone, he just wanted people to respect him, and yes, the thrill was nice, but now that Matty was truly looking back at what he had done, he realized that he had shot at someone, that he could have killed a man over a few hundred dollars, and that wasn't the sort of person he wanted to be, no thrill was worth that.

George was important though, he was the most important thing in Matty's life, and it was stupid of him not to listen to him before now. Matty knew this robbery had been a fluke, and he would most likely be fine if he wanted to try again, but when he met George's gaze briefly and saw how shattered he looked, Matty realized that he would do anything to make sure George didn't have to go through this a second time.

Maybe George was right all along, perhaps they could find something else to do with their lives. Matty wasn't entirely certain how that would work yet, but he did know that he never wanted to see George in this state again, because it hurt even more than the gunshot wound did.

Matty was tired of scaring George, and now that he was allowing himself to view his own actions with unclouded eyes, he understood George's stroppy attitude lately. He wasn't being unrealistic or dramatic, he was just trying to protect Matty, and from now on, he was going to let him.