Ours [harry styles] ✓

Green Eyed Monster

Elenore's self esteem, dating profile plan was yet to fufill its promise. I hadn't had one reply on my profile yet and it had left me feeling somewhat deflated. The worst thing was that Harry was due to pick Nola up within the next hour and with no potential dates to keep my spirits up, I was sure to crack the minute I answered the door to him. I'd even contemplated hiding in my room and pretending I was out so that Elenore could deal with him instead. On the other hand, after much thought, I had decided that was just as childish as Harry giving me the cold shoulder. I didn't care who they were or what they looked like, but as long as someone else other than Harry Styles was taking an interest in me, I would be at least 30% happy. 

I tried to keep myself occupied by packing Nola's bag. She sat beside me, carefully selecting which toys were lucky enough to spend the weekend in her company. I found myself wishing that my life was as simple as selecting toys to spend time with. Instead my personal information was posted on a 'lonely hearts' website for someone else to find and decide if they wanted to spend time in my company. It was humilating. Elenore had spent the day glued to a seat at the dining table. The laptop was perched in front of her, only the 'lonely hearts' screen loaded. Every now and then she would refresh the page, sighing whenever my reply count remained at '0'. I wanted to tell her to give up, forget about this ridiculous plan that clearly wasn't working and find another way to help me get out of this funk. On the other hand, if there was any chance that my count might go up by at least one between now and Harry's arrival, I was going to take it. Obviously I wasn't going to tell Harry that I was officially 'back on the market', but it would likely give me some sort of confidence when I came face to face with him again. As the days has passed without him I'd struggled to remember when I'd ended things in the first place. 

"What about your teddy?" I asked Nola, waving the stuffed bear in her face. She shook her head, her curls bouncing as she did so, and began rummaging in her toy box. I watched, confused, until she produced a fistful of bandanas. Of course. She was her father's daughter, how could I forget? I took the colourful pieces of fabric from her little clenched fist and tucked them into the side of the bag, wondering what they were doing in her toy box in the first place. 

Deep down I knew I was kidding myself if I didn't end up verbally abusing Harry about his ignorance towards me. Our co-parenting was already falling apart. How were we supposed to raise Nola together if we couldn't even speak to another? A knock on the door had my head snapping upright. My heart race increased and my eyes widened. I turned to Elenore frantically.

"Ele, please tell me there's a reply?" 

Elenore bit her lip. "Sorry, Marn. Nothing yet."

I groaned loudly and pulled myself to my feet, zipping Nola's bag up and tossing it onto the sofa. Somehow I was going to have to answer the door and act as though Harry's ignoring me wasn't bothering me in the slightest. Somehow I had to show him that I didn't miss him. I paced towards the door, my blood pounding in my ears as I did so. Harry's silhouette stuck out like a sore thumb through the frosted glass, his Fedora being the most eye catching part. The last thing I needed was for him to look good. In a last minute panic I looked down at myself, cringing at my choice of attire. An oversized red shirt and sweatpants was not an outfit that screamed - "I don't need you!" I was totally bare faced, my hair scraped back and held in place with a head band. I was screwed. 

Reluctantly I pushed on the door handle and raised my eyes to meet Harry's. His lips were pressed into a hard line, his eyes dark and smoldering. He still looked mad. I opened my mouth to speak but found myself not quite sure what to say.

"Hi." He said for me, looking down uncomfortably. Great. Now he couldn't look at me either.

"Hi." I echoed, forcing the words out of my dry mouth. "Come in, I'll just grab Nola's stuff." I stepped aside and gestured for Harry to come into the hallway. He did so without a word, still looking at his feet.