~ Can't You Help Me As I'm Starting To Burn? ~

Part 20

Normal POV

I felt like I was floating.

Completely weightless.

I couldn't feel my body, couldn't feel my breath as it came in and out.

Couldn't feel anything.

I could only think.

My mind is going absolutely crazy.

Thoughts continuously running through my brain.

I have no idea where I'm at.

I know I'm somewhere I'm not used to.

I know I'm not alone.

I can smell cologne.

A man's cologne.

Whose?

I have no idea.

And there's this constant beeping.

It doesn't seem to ever stop and it's starting to get really annoying.

Just beep, beep, beep, beep.

Over and over and over again.

The more I thought about the beeping, the more things that came back to me.

I remember dinner with Matt.

That was a good night.

A good memory.

One that I will store in my brain, and never forget.

And whenever I'm feeling sad, I can go back to that day, and remember that even though it was only a few hours, I had been absolutely happy.

I remember talking to Matt.

Him being completely interested about what I had to say.

A first for me, to say the least.

He was leaning forward on the table, his elbows on the edge, and his chin rested between his hands, just looking at me.

He took in everything I was saying as if it was vital that he catch everything.

Also a first for me.

I remember trying to remind myself not to stare at him.

But with his arms up on the table the way they were, it was really hard.

The way his tattoos looked over his big, sculpted arms.

Made me want him to wrap them around me, and hold me close, never let me go.

I remember saying goodbye.

Feeling a heart shattering pain flow through me as I pulled away from his hug.

Away from his arms that made me feel so safe and warm.

Then my memories got darker.

I was driving home.

Driving home really slow too.

I was trying to take my time, waste as much time as possible.

Cars were passing my by, cutting me off and flipping me off for holding up traffic.

But I didn't want to go home.

Why didn't I want to go home?

Oh.

Of course.

Ryan.

He's the reason I didn't want to go home.