LET'S KEEP IT A SECRET

Chapter 21

Struggling to bear with the pain and staying with the person who loved you as much as he hurt you. That was my life 3 years ago. 3 years ago where it all came crumbling down, the dreams I had with that person. I repeatedly asked myself why I stayed, why I endured and what would've been the outcome if I left. 

That doesn't matter anymore.

 I am with the person I love, the person that makes me happy just from hearing him laugh and just by seeing his face. I am so in love that the pain I felt before doesn't even affect me now. Yes you could say I got immune to that pain. You could say I simply moved on but all that matters now is that I'm happy. 

I'm happy. 

" Soo Won! Come here! You have to see this! Faster!" 

He struggled coming to me, bumping into things. 

"Look! It's when you were still a baby! Daddy's holding you tight because he was scared that he would break you." 

He smiled then looked at me, eyes sparkling as if he saw his favorite toy in a toy store stocked on the shelf. 

"Daddy! Love! Daddy!"

All of us (family) knows the fact that this little guy loves his Daddy very much. I might get left behind if I don't separate them soon and spend time with him alone. 

"Daddy will soon arrive so why don't we put on some nice clothes and surprise him outside. You like that?"

He jumped with joy, rushed to his bedroom and got out his clothes. It's so fun seeing him like this. I wish he would remain this small and precious and fluffy and oh my god I just love this kid so much I can't breathe.

"Go! Ma! Go!"

He's trying to tell me to go now. Amma pinch this cute little boy asdfghjkl. Since he still don't know how to put on clothes, he's just holding it up and telling me to hurry up so we can go down. 

" Just wait, honey. We don't want to rush. Come on, I'll help you put your clothes on." 

We finished and got down to the front of our apartment building to wait for his Dad. It's taking too long so we decided to play around for a while while we wait. Soowon likes to draw on the ground and pick stuff up from everywhere. He looks so innocent and pure and you know, a kid that came down from heaven. There are times when I just look at him when he's asleep and tell myself how I don't deserve such an angelic baby but he's the reason why I got myself together and get rid of the pain and suffering I've been holding on for too long. I am thankful to have this little child come to my arms and grace me with his innocent and pure soul. 

"DADDY!!!" 

I cleared my thoughts as I heard Soowon call for his Dad. I smiled as I saw his face lit up upon seeing his baby boy run towards him. I wish I'm not the only one witnessing this scene. Considering what I've been through, this is a scene that will move everyone's heart. 

They walked towards me and Soowon grabbed my hand. I stood up from where I was sitting and patted his head.

"Let's go." 

We got to our apartment, had dinner and gave Soowon his bath. 

"Do you feel refreshed now?" 

Soowon nodded his head while I was drying his hair. God, why are kids so precious? 

" Let's go to bed now. Say good night to Daddy."

He bid his Daddy good night and got a kiss to his forehead. I usually read him bed time stories but nowadays as soon as we get to his bed, a few pats will solve the problem. How nice is it to fall asleep as soon as you lay in bed. 

I walked to my bedroom and tucked myself in. 

"Dara." 

I face the other ways so I am now facing the person in front of me. He pulled me in closer and wrapped his arms around me and I did the same. 

"I love you." 

"I love you too, Jiyong. I always will."