Zaraaya

CHAPTER 8:

"Everybody has gone through something that has changed them in a way that they could never go back to the person they once were."

Helplessness is such a rotten feeling. There's nothing you can do about it. Being helpless is like being paralyzed. It's a sickness. The cure calls for a monumental effort to stand up and start walking somewhere, anywhere. But that takes some doing. And when you see the devil standing in front of you with large scissors in hands, that thought of doing anything shrivels and hides in the far, dark corner. That's exactly what is happening to me right now. As I sit crouched down, Xanius is in front of me, standing tall and proud with the scissors in his hands. A sly smirk on his lips terrifies me like no other. He crouches down to my eye level and stares at me. I stare back at his eyes in awe as I see his feelings swarming in his eyes. His eyes held so much anger, hatred, and violence that it left me thunderstruck. In my moment of admiration, he took hold of a chunk of my black hair an-

"Chop! Chop!". My eyes widened. H-he cut my hair?! Oh, my God! My hair was one of the only things I liked about myself, and he had destroyed that too. I couldn't feel anything, I went numb. The only thing I could hear was the sound of the scissor chomping and the loud, evil snickers of the Primes. My heart ached for my lumps of hair falling from my scalp to my palm and then on the ground. Disappointment filled my veins. Disappointment because I could do nothing to save my hair. Hair is a girl's prized possession, what was he thinking when he cut my hair off like this? Why did they hate me so much? What was wrong with me? Surely something was wrong, otherwise, why would an entire school of students hate me?

As the noise started to continue, students started to crowd around us. Taking pictures and videos, they started to mock me. I shut my eyes, forcing myself to have a little bit more courage. Forcing myself to think that if I held onto that thin line of patience, surely something better would come my way. But that thin line was gone. So was my willpower. Unable to hold it in anymore, I opened the gates of my eyes, and let my tears flow freely. At least something about me was free. Involuntarily, a small whimper escaped my lips. Then another, followed by a full-on explosion of sobs and whimpers.

"P-please, stop it. P-please! Don't d-do this to me, please! I'm begging you Xanius, please stop this. X-Xanius!"

But there was no stopping him, and somewhere deep down I knew I couldn't stop him, nothing could. And nothing did. He continued to chop my hairs off, and I continued sobbing. I was a mess, and I didn't need a mirror to prove that. All the waves of laughter, the mocking stares, the condescending words, everything made me feel sick in my stomach. And I puked. I let out the contents of my stomach. Xanius quickly jumped off, stepping behind as he made a disgusted face. Everyone immediately scrunched up their faces and stepped away from me. They stopped their videos and eventually left. But I didn't, I couldn't. So I sat there, contemplating my life. Wondering how on Earth I managed to fall in this situation where nothing ever seemed to work in my favor. I cried and cried until there were no more tears left, no more screams left, no more dignity left. 

I knew I couldn't go back to class anymore. I didn't know if I could ever go back to class again where I knew the monsters from my worst nightmares awaited for me, lurking in the darknesses, waiting for an excuse to snatch me from my life, from anything that made me happy. So I stayed put on the ground. I stayed there until all my classes got over. I made a move only after I heard the last of the students leave the school. Then I got up and immediately felt my knees complaining. After stretching a bit, I decided to go to my class and get my books. I kept my head down as I walked down the empty and seemingly eerie hallway. It was weird seeing this hallway so empty as usually its filled with students. Ignoring the dark thoughts in my head, I took in a breath and steadied myself and continued walking further down the hallway until my classroom came into view. I opened the door and saw my books were thrown all around the class. With a heavy sigh, I bent down and began to pick my books up. Once I picked all my books, I turned around and left the classroom. I started walking back home. I could've taken a bus, but I needed some time to get fresh air and just think clearly.

 I took in a big breath of air. It was mixed with a mild stench of smoke and cheap liquor from the drunk guys around the corner. But even then, the air seemed better than that at the school. I could hear glass bottles breaking, drunk people arguing, but I didn't care. In fact, I wasn't even scared. What could they take from me? Nothing was left of me. My innocence? Taken. My pride? Crushed. My confidence? Snatched. My dignity? Chopped off. My happiness? Killed. My home? Destroyed.