scavenger.

20 - running late

Anri was staring in the mirror again.

Before this, she'd never looked in one this clean. No scratches, even. Now she could see every last pore on her skin, it felt like. Every last tangle in her hair.

It wasn't quite vanity that pulled her to this mirror (of course, she wouldn't deny that vanity was part of it), it was something more like wonder. Wonder that just weeks ago she'd looked in her ship's mirror, scratched and mudded, and all she'd truly been able to see were her own eyes. And now she was here, lightyears away, on some marvelous forest moon where water fell from the sky. Not quite Corellia, not yet—but a test run, maybe, of what Corellia must be like.

And it was everything it was cracked up to be.

Anri was giddy. She almost wanted to sing. As she thought this, a combination of letters and syllables formed in her head—unrecognizable, certainly not any language she'd ever learned or heard or seen. But she could read these letters, in her head—knew what sound each shape was supposed to make. Meanwhile she still couldn't read Basic.

They were lyrics to some half-forgotten lullaby. She knew the melody, the sounds, but not the meaning. It'd driven her half crazy as a child, trying desperately to grasp at any memory she could find—having been deprived of them all sometime around her ninth or tenth year—but now she didn't care so much. She just let it play. Hummed it out. Now that she was off Jakku, she had ample time to find out whose lullaby it was.

Anri was discovering something. If you looked in a mirror for long enough, the room shrunk around you. Your eyes got bigger. Your hands looked strange. You were just a soul—no, not a soul, but then what?—you were just a brain looking with your eyeballs at the rest of your organs. You saw what everyone else saw.

Anri pinched the skin around her navel, feeling the fat between her fingers. Before this she was all bones. But with Jace insisting on her eating every day, she was getting fat as a Hutt. For the first time in her life, she wasn't starving. Her stomach hadn't growled in days...

Anri finally pulled herself away from the mirror and wandered back into the hospital room, stuffing her hands in her pants pockets. They were very big pockets—she could stretch the length of her fingers and not touch a seam. Anri sorely wished there was a window here. She wanted to see the outdoors all the time. See if it was "raining," as Jace called it.

Jace was running late today.

The bounty hunter, of course, had been missing for days. Anri wasn't quite worried about him. Taking care of himself was what he was best at. She knew that without bitterness—and why would she be bitter?

But Jace was running late today.

A knock at the door. Anri whirled around, even though she knew already it wasn't Jace. Didn't feel like him. "Come in."

The door slid open and a Twi-lek medic walked in, holding a tray of food. She sat it on the bedside table. "Miss, you know you really shouldn't be up."

"Where's Captain Sato?"

The medic smiled a little bit. Her posture was very straight. "He's in a meeting."

"A meeting, huh." Anri couldn't detect any trace of a lie, but it still felt sketchy. She sat down. "What about my ship?"

"What ship?"

"The freighter. Big, disc-shaped. That's my ship. Where's she? I never saw her in the hangar."

"I don't know about any ship, I'm sorry—I barely go to the hangar."

"Right, I know." Anri fell back onto the bed with a huff. "It was worth a shot. Thank you."

The medic left and Anri was alone with her thoughts again. Every time she asked about her ship, Jace changed the subject. There was no guilt in him, so she knew it was around here somewhere. He wouldn't let her see it, for some reason.

Anri suddenly regretted not asking the medic her name. It was rude, she knew, to immediately demand answers of the poor girl and not even really thank her for the food. She needed to learn manners. She remembered the way Jace ate with his hands. Plucking meat from the bone. Slipping it discreetly between his lips.

Anri sat up and grabbed the tray. She straightened her shoulders. She picked up a roll. She broke it in half. She broke the half in half. She placed it between her teeth, and chewed with her mouth closed. She did it again, and again, and again. Sometimes she caught herself slouching a little, so she straightened again.

She pretended to be somewhere very important and fancy, decked in jewelry—real jewelry, not the fake stones she'd strung together and covered herself with on Jakku. Shiny, vibrant, genuine jewelry. She had to eat carefully as not to sully the rings on her fingers. An important, handsome man sat across from her, and she had to impress him. Later she'd seduce him for money—

Anri blinked. What? No, she wouldn't do that. She'd never have to do that again. She broke off another piece of the roll.

Jace Sato sat across from her this time, smiling, blue eyes glowing. He didn't want anything from her, didn't expect anything from her. He tore at food with his teeth. Anri laughed, and picked up a napkin to dab the rubble from his face—

The door slid open, and Anri jolted suddenly, the tray nearly falling from her lap. Jace—the real Jace—gave a laugh.

"I didn't mean to startle you."

Anri's cheeks reddened and she quickly stood up, putting the tray on the side table. "Where, uh, where've you been?"

Jace shrugged nonchalantly. "A meeting. Do you want to go see your ship?"

"What sort of—oh, yes!" Her original question slipped her mind entirely with the thought of finally seeing her ship again. "Does this mean I can leave?"

Jace's face sank. Anri felt the stab and immediately hated herself. She wasn't sure why.

His grin quickly returned as if it had never left and he nodded. "Yeah, you can."

"I won't," she blurted.

Silence fell.

Jace looked shocked.

Anri was shocked.

Her mouth was dry.

She looked down and pressed a hand to her stomach. Her words were slow. "My wound...still hurts. I mean," Anri licked her lip. "I mean I'll stay longer. I won't leave today."

When her eyes travelled to his face again, she saw a grin. The air around him lifted. He seemed to catch himself and pursed his lips, but his dimples persisted.

"Let's, uh," he looked around. "Let's go."