a daydream away // moey fanfiction

41

"You can't get away from yourself by moving from one place to another."

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(Joey's POV.)

You can't determine how your day is going to turn out right when you wake up in the morning. You know, when you turn your neck and you get hit when an unwanted pain? Or when you first open your eyes and you're blinded by bright sunlight? The first few seconds of your day will not tell the future, but... Sometimes you just get that feeling.

First of all, I didn't wake up how I did yesterday. Why? Because my arms weren't wrapped around Meghan's waist. Instead, they were cradling the pale yellow pillow that was placed on this bed of this small, cheap Motel by some maid that was probably receiving minimum wage and is only working here to get by.

I let her sleep alone yesterday night (or this morning, I haven't been keeping track of the time. The last time I checked the time was when I was waiting for our Chinese takeout to get here) because she didn't seem up for it. Of course she seemed up for it while were kissing, but after that I think reality kicked in for both of us. The way she acted so reclusive and to herself while she ate made me feel like I was pushing it too much.

After that I just slipped in a movie and we both fell asleep in different beds.

... How it used to be.

Second of all, when I looked over at the other bed, Meghan's body wasn't anywhere to be seen. This caused me to sit up in a daze. I shuffled out from under the sheets and walked over to the other bed, scratching the back of my neck involuntarily. As I looked at the sea of white sheets I felt nothing but a blank feeling inside of me. I felt as blank as this cotton duvet, sitting there in a unkempt pile in the middle of the mattress. 

I ran a hand through my dirty hair and I peered around the incredibly small room. The only other option was the bathroom. As I made my way to the bathroom door her voice stopped me in my tracks. Found her.

"I just don't know what to do anymore. The last thing I want is to hurt him, and I can already see it coming. He's going to leave and I'm going to be left with nothing, again." 

My mouth popped open at the sound of her sniffled, quiet voice. I could tell she was trying to keep her voice low, which hurt even more. My mouth was gaining dryness with each second that ticked by.

"I know that. I still remember what you said to me at the party. I believe it."

My heart leaped into my throat. My mind suddenly felt like a clock, all the gears working to reverse my memory to the party. I wasn't there for as long as she was, so I could only remember a few people. I felt the familiar tightness in my throat come back with a vengeance as a person came to my head. 

The guy she kissed. 

My head swam as I wobbled back in disbelief. It absolutely couldn't be. I turned my back to the door and focused on keeping the tears in my eyes. If they started to fall they weren't going to stop. I pressed my palms to my cheeks as I hurried back over to the bed. I slipped under the sheets, covering my head with them. I felt like a vulnerable child,

"Thanks for your help. No, really, I'll have to thank you somehow. I should go before he gets up. Hah, stop it. Okay, bye." 

I sucked in a breath between clenched teeth before clasping the blankets tighter over my head. I breathed in the odd scent of them, before feeling slightly revolted and letting go of them. They sunk slowly before falling back onto my face.

It sort of helped me calm down, but then I heard her footsteps and all the emotions came right back around, boomerang style.

This sheet was the only thing separating us now, as I felt her kneel down beside my bed.