complementary love | jhs + kth

18: he's tough

i feel a layer of warmth cover me. it wakes me up because i was freezing before, despite tae laying on me. i open my eyes.

hoseok is on the bed, covering me and taehyung with blankets.

"hoseok?" i say groggily. "what time is it?"

"like, 2 in the morning." he yawns. i've only been asleep for two hours? i look down. taehyung is still sleeping on my chest. he finally looks peaceful.

hoseok scoots behind me and leans forward. he brushes tae's hair with his fingers.

"you managed to calm him down." he smiles.

"yeah." i simply say. then i punch him in the stomach. "no thanks to you."

he holds the spot i hit him. "ya, was that necessary?"

"yes!" i hiss at him. "you left him when he needed you the most, hoseok." 

hoseok's eyes widen. "i didn't know it was that serious."

i glare at him. "yes you did, hoseok. you knew what today was."

his eyes return to normal and he looks at sleeping tae. "i guess...i was afraid of how he'd act."

he puts his hand on my leg and rubs it. "i can't handle sadness well. i can only make people smile."

"and you could've done that." i reply. "he wants your smile."

"but how could i smile when he's in such a state?" he shakes his head.

i guess that's true. i could barely manage a smile myself when i saw taehyung cry.

"i've only ever seen taehyung break down when we're with the members. i'm never there when he tries to cry in front of me." hoseok continues. "i don't think i could ever handle it."

"well, you're gonna have to eventually." i mutter. he looks up at me.

he tries to take my hand but i pull it back. i'm angry at him still. even if he couldn't handle it, shouldn't he have still tried? especially for someone who he 'cared' so much about.

"please understand me, bomi." he pleads. his voice sounds sincere, i always easily melt when i hear it. i still stand my ground though.

"what's so wrong about letting someone else do what you can't?"

"but you can, hoseok." i look at him seriously. "you always do it with me. don't be so cautious when you try it with tae. he's your best friend."

he takes in my answer and slowly nods. "you're right, jagi, you're right."

he leans forward again. at first, i think he's about to kiss me, but then his face goes past me. he kisses tae on the forehead.

then he turns to me. he presses his forehead against mine, my favorite gesture. he pushes my hair behind my ear.

"i'm sorry, bomi. i'll change for the better." he whispers. the anger disappears immediately...but i feel like it won't be gone forever. i don't know if i can believe him.

nonetheless, i smile because i'll trust him for now.

he lays behind me. he wraps his arms around my lower torso, below where tae has his arms. he rests his head on the crook of neck and snuggles against it. much more comforting compared to the first time we shared a bed together.