Meant To Be - A Troyler fanfic

chapter 9

* Troye's pov*

Fears and doubts had been troubling my thoughts and clinging on to my spirts, like an anchor slowly dragging me below the suface, and with each agonising minute that passed I was being taken to the point of no return,  towards my eventual doom and self destruction.

Just when the pressure on my lungs became too great, my head already pounding, and water threatened to crush my weak and defenseless body, when I was about to relieve myself of my being, I felt movement.  Water was rushing past me as my body arched backwards, the darkness that had surrounded me was lifting-I was being pulled back up to open air! And finally my head broke through the icy surface and my lungs gratefully drank the morning air.

It felt as though I'd tricked Atlas into shouldering the weight of the sky, I was finally free.

That's what it felt like having someone know my secret, and accepting me for who I am, to know that someone whom I truly cared about didn't reject me, but welcomed me with open arms. That is the effect of Tyler's reassurance and mutual feelings.

Snippets of what happened merely two hours ago were replaying in my head, and I couldn't help but smile at the memories. They meant more to me than Tyler would ever know. They not only meant that Tyler accepted me, but it also confirmed that Tyler -THE Tyler Oakley- liked me back. I squeezed the pillow I'd been curled up against even tighter,  badly needing to fangirl but noting that I could easily be heard.

I tried to take long, deep breaths,  hoping to calm my heartbeat, but Tyler's face kept resurfacing and I just couldn't. I sighed and turned over, so I was now lying in my bed, beneath the soft, white hotel covers.

I've been tossing and turning ever since I got into bed, right after I had a freak out fangirl session as soon as I closed the door. Sleep was obviously not option tonight, I was way too happy and excited, adrenaline still pulsing through my body.

It was 4a.m, there's only one thing to do at such an hour: Tumblr.
I reached over to the bedside table on my left, where my beloved laptop was placed. I opened it an was overwhelmed by the light of a thousand suns. Once my eyes had gotten used to the blinding light, and I tried to connect with the hotel's wifi,  but it kept asking for a password, which was weird since we can connect automatically once we book a room.

I glanced at a laminated paper on my bedside table which read "Free Wifi!", and below it, in tiny lettering, "please contact reception desk for your personal password". I groaned as I noted that I had to actually talk to people if I wanted to use my people-avoiding pass time.

I sighed as I kicked off my sheets and got up. I had 'slept' in my clothes so I was decent enough to go talk to the receptionist without needing to change. I grabbed my keycard, taking my laptop with me, and left the room, walked down the corridor, down the elevator and got to the lobby. I approached the surprised-looking receptionist and asked her for the wifi password.  After blinking a few times she ruffled through some papers and gave me a series of numbers and letters. I thanked her and made my way to my room, deciding to take the stairs for a change.

As I climbed the stairs I connected my laptop to the hotel's wifi and opened tumblr. My dash immediately exploaded,  new posts filling every inch. As i happily went through it -I was now at my floor- I noticed a post from Tyler, dated 3 minutes ago.

I had reached my door, but now I looked over to Tyler's room and realised that he was probably awake. I glanced one last time at my room before walking the short distance to Tilly's room. My heart pounded as I wondered whether or not I should bother Tyler at such an hour, but he was awake and I don't think he'd mind my presence...I hope.