T-Shirt Girl (COMPLETED)

TSG 19 - Let Her Go

"But you only need the light when it's burning low. Only miss the sun when it starts to snow. Only know you love her when you let her go. And you let her go..." --Let Her Go, Passenger

----

He was staring at her picture for a long time now. It was taken when they went out once. They each got a cotton candy on one hand. Ang isang nitong kamay ay nakakapit sa braso niya. His other hand took the picture. He meant to upload it later that night pero nakalimutan na niya.

He zoomed in the picture hanggang sa si Jae na lamang ang nasa screen.

"You're in love with her," he remembered them say. Kahit anong pilit niya, hindi niya maalalang minahal niya ito. He just likes her. He knew the feeling of being in love. He should have realized it by the time that he did fall in love with her. But it completely eluded him.

And now he feels empty. Depressed daw ang isang tao kapag tulog ito nang tulog. Depressed yata siya. Palagi siyang tulog nitong mga nakaraang araw. Before the Christmas break, he was such a workaholic. Uuwi lamang siya para matulog ng ilang oras tapos para kumain at maligo. Ayaw niyang naglalagi sa bahay. Ayaw niyang wala siyang ginagawa.

Dahil kapag wala siyang ginagawa, nagsisimula siyang mag-isip. Nagsisimula syang umalala. Kaya nang magbakasyon, tulog siya nang tulog. At least his subconscious self can dream. And in his dreams, she's there.

Sabi ng mga kaibigan niya, tanga raw sya dahil hindi man lang niya naramdaman ang pagbabago. But that must be love, right? It's like a speeding bullet. You will only know you were hit when you see yourself bleeding. And when you finally see it, you're already losing blood.

He felt like he was hit straight in the heart. It didn't hurt at first, not until his mind recognizes the pain. He must be in love with Jae, but she left before he could even process the thought.

Now, she's already halfway across the world, ready to get over him. At ang mas masakit pa doon... hindi na ito babalik pa. He was in the past now. Jae will never look back, because she was so tired of hurting.

"Anak?"

He locked his phone and put it under his pillow. "Po?"

"Bakit hindi ka pa bumabangon? Hindi ka ba sasama sa pagsimba?"

Umiling siya. "Sa New Year na lang ako, 'nay."

His mother gave him a disapproving look. "Anak, Pasko ngayon. Kahit ngayon lang, magsimba ka."

Nagtalukbong siya ng kumot at naghintay hanggang sa mangalay katatayo ang nanay niya at lumabas na ito ng kwarto. Kinuha niya ang phone niya mula sa ilalim ng unan at binuksan iyong muli. Talaga bang natututo lamang magpahalaga ang tao kapag nawala na ang mga bagay na dapat niyang pahalagahan?

He sighed and closed his eyes.

--

"Mamamasko po!"

He was already half asleep with he heard their voices. Alam niyang sina Rico iyon. He had been avoiding them too. Naiinis siya sa sarili niyang mas nauna pa silang nakaalam kaysa kanya. Bakit sila, nahalata nila kahit minsan lang nilang nakasama si Jae? Dahil lang sa pagkikwento niya, nakapag-conclude na sila ng ganoon. Bakit siya, hindi niya nahalata?

"Mamamasko po!"

He grunted. Wala nang tao sa bahay kundi siya.

"Toby!"

Sighing, he got up the bed and went downstairs. Pinagbuksan niya ng pinto ang mga ito saka pinapasok sa bahay nila.

"Wala akong pera. Kumain na lang kayo." Itinuro niya ang kusina. Then he headed to the stairs.