All I Am *Gerard Way fanfic*

Still day one

I thought the moment I met Gerard Way, I'd fangirl and piss my pants, but no,I was in the back of his van with a random girl about to do god knows what! I want to talk to the girl, but the words won't form. I see a notepad across the floor and point to it. She opens it and shoves it my way forcefully. Oh, one of those time I'm lucky I'm a writer, I never leave the house without a pen. I pull it out my pocket and scribble something down.

Hi. I'm Erin. Where are we going, exactly?

She read over my note. "I'm Shadow. And I've got no clue. To be honest, I have very mixed emotions about this." she said, locks flying everywhere trying to explain our situation.

I quickly wrote down, You can say that again. and chuckled. She giggled and looked at where Gerard was. He was watching us throught the rear veiw mirrior, burying daggers into us with his eyes. His gaze turned so he was only looking at me.

"You," he said pointing a finger in my direction, not paying attion to the road. "Sing for me. I don't care what just sing." he said, now looking at the road.

Shadow looked at me and I looked back at her. I wrote so fast, you wouldn't be able to see my hand move. Shadow, read this out loud to him. Mr. Way, I don't talk. I refuse to talk, I really hate to burst your bubble, but no words are coming out of my mouth anytime soon. Sorry, Mr. Way, but don't hurt me because of my choice, to no voice.

She read it to him and I gave her a nod, silently thanking her. "Don't give me that bull," he said, "I heard you talk to the girl back at the school. Don't lie to me, kid." I opened my mouth to protest, but he slammed the heel of his hand aginst the stearing wheel and smirked. He looked into the mirror at me. "My point exactly."

"I'm not a kid." I mumbled, hoping he didn't hear. But, with my luck, he heard.

"What was that?" He asked cupping his ear, smirk still on his face. "I don't think I heard."

"I'm NOT a kid. I'm sick of being treated like one." I said louder so he could hear me. A gasp came from my side, but I didn't lift my head off my knees

"Y'know, you must be the big sister, 'cause I said the exact same thing. But you've got a nice voice, you should talk more often." He said his words laced with a suductive tone.

I lifted my head up and looked into the mirror to find him looking at me again. I shook my head. "If you want me to sing, then cover your ears." I was thinking of a song to sing, then it hit me and I began

I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing

Just prayed to a God that I don't believe in

'Cause I got time while she got freedom

'Cause when a heart breaks, no, it don't break even

Her best days were some of my worst

She finally met a man that's gonna put her first

While I'm wide awake she's no trouble sleeping

'Cause when a heart breaks no it don't break even... even... no

What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you?

And what am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're OK?

I'm falling to pieces, yeah,

I'm falling to pieces

They say bad things happen for a reason

But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding

'Cause she's moved on while I'm still grieving

And when a heart breaks no it don't break even, even... no

What am I gonna do when the best part of me was always you?

And what am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're OK?

I'm falling to pieces, yeah,

I'm falling to pieces, yeah,

I'm falling to pieces

(One still in love while the other one's leaving)

I'm falling to pieces

('Cause when a heart breaks no it don't break even)

Oh, you got his heart and my heart and none of the pain

You took your suitcase, I took the blame.

Now I'm tryna make sense of what little remains, ooh

'Cause you left me with no love and honour to my name.

I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing

Just prayed to a God that I don't believe in

'Cause I got time while she got freedom

'Cause when a heart breaks, no, it don't break...

No, it don't break

No, it don't break even, no

What am I gonna do when the best part of me was always you?

And what am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're OK?

(Oh glad you're okay now)

I'm falling to pieces, yeah

I'm falling to pieces, yeah

(Oh I'm falling, falling)

I'm falling to pieces,

(One still in love while the other one's leaving)

I'm falling to pieces

('Cause when a heart breaks, no, it don't break even)

Oh, it don't break even no

Oh, it don't break even no

Oh, it don't break even no

I finished and turned my back towards everyone, it was incredibly silent. Had I really screwed up so bad that they had lost they're hearing? And did I just mess up singing infront of Gerard Way? Oh man everyone was right, I'm a emo fuck-up who should die. I should have ended it along time ago, but I had faith then. It's all gone now.

I was so deep in thought I hadn't noticed I was crying. Shadow had come up behind me and hugged me. Or at least I thought it was Shadow. When did we stop the car, so Gerard and Shadow could trade places? Whatever, Gerard Way was roughing me!! This would have been the best time to hug him back but I couldn't move, I was afraid to.

"That was beautiful. I want you to sing again, but now, you should sleep, Erin." He said laying my head in his lap and stoking my hair. Just like how I used to fall asleep with my dad. And with all of that, I fell asleep.

(A/n what a crappy chapter ending :( I'll do better next time. Also the song in this chapter Breakeven by The Script, is a really good song, I highly recomend it.)