Start Again (BoyxBoy)

Chapter 8 - Akwardly Sweet

Chapter 8

I just woke up the next day with a huge headache that was probably due to crying. I just got up and did my morning routine before my cousin and I went to school. It was only Tuesday, but I’m already done with the week. I don’t want any more trouble. I feel that I started my new life badly. I got to school but my mind wasn’t in my head at that moment. I constantly spaced out as I was walking around the hallway and eventually I hit someone and I fell to the floor. Bumping into people was probably my thing.

“Watch where you’re going, you idiot.” He said.

I looked up and it was a football player, not even surprising. I don’t have anything against your stereotypical jock but if you’re rude to me, I might as well return the favour but I wasn’t in the mood so I just walked away to go to my class. When I got to my first period’s class room, I noticed that Jean wasn’t there. She probably skipped and I should have just as well. I spent the whole period on editing the photos Jean and I took yesterday. The bell eventually rang and it made my heart pound hastily.

I did not want to go to the class where I will see Justin. My confession to him, even though I know that he’s not the type of person to judge, was really hurtful for me and I don’t know why. Maybe it’s because I’m really afraid to open up to him because he might leave me? I don’t even know. Maybe I should just skip. No. I won’t do something stupid like skip a class I love just for some guy that I haven’t even known for a long time. When I got to my bio class, it was still empty. I must be really early. I just sat down, placed my arms on the arm rest and placed my head on it. I closed my eyes so I could block out all unnecessary thoughts. I guess it was working. I looked up to check if Justin was already there, apparently he’s not. Maybe he’s not coming? There’s a lot of questions that came into my mind.

I just took notes while our teacher discussed and unfortunately after around ten minutes, Justin came into the room. He apologized to our teacher and walked towards his seat. Seriously, my notes suddenly became the most interesting thing in the world every time he arrives. His seat suddenly screeched so I know that he wasn’t facing me anymore, so I looked up and all I saw were blue eyes that were staring at me and his natural smile that always made me blush.

He blinked, “Good Morning, Renz.”

I partly smiled. “Good Morning.”

“How are you? You haven’t been texting me ever since…” He suddenly stopped then continued, “It’s good to see that you’re doing fine.”

Finally, he faced forward. Thank the Lord. To be honest, I want to strangle him right now because of what he knows, but I can’t do it because he’s still that sweet guy I know. Despite the fact that he knows that I’m not straight, he continues on being his regular self; hopefully it’s not just a fabricated disposition. I’m so confused and I really don’t want anything to happen. Fear is taking over my nervous system and I was breaking down inside. When she made us do an activity, I decided to go to the bathroom. Washing my face would probably help me stay awake and strong. While I was washing my face someone entered the room.

“Lorenz.” A familiar voice said, and by familiar I mean Justin.

I wiped my face and replied, “Yes?”

“Do you w…” He was stuttering. “Do you want to eat out after school?”

I stared at him like he was a ghost. “Um. I have rehearsals after school.”

“I will wait for you.”

“I have to go home immediately, Justin.”

“Please? I just want to hang out with someone and my friends are really busy…” He begged.