Particles | Chris O'Neill

>six<

I'm getting way ahead of myself lmao this story's gonna be over if I keep updating. Also, there's an original character I'm adding- I hope that's okay!! I wanted to add some angst, ya know? I know this chapter may be garbage, but I'll probably rewrite it later. 

y/n's POV

After the movie, we all head back to our cars. I offer to take Chris, Julian, and Ding Dong home since they all live together. Chris sits in the front seat.

"If I see anyone fuckin' back there I'm gonna turn this car around," I say, looking in the rearview mirror. DD and Julian laugh, and Chris does his signature closed-mouthed chuckle that sends a surge of affection through my body. 

"So have you written any words to the song yet?" He asks. I nod slowly, slightly embarrassed for some reason.

"Yeah, actually, I have." He smiles over at me.

"I want to hear it!" He says.

"Us too!" Ding Dong says from the back seat. I shoot him a look.

"It's not ready for y'all yet," I say. The two doofuses in the back laugh at me.

"When can I hear it?" Chris asks as we pull up to their apartment building. I feel slightly disappointed that I'm dropping him off. I want to spend more time with him. I want to get to know him more. But let's be honest, what I want to do more than anything is kiss him. But I'm sure he wouldn't reciprocate the feelings I have for him. I don't look like the girls he's friends with. Even though I'm pretty sure I'm his only single, female friend in LA, I know he's got loads of friends elsewhere who are way skinnier and prettier than me. 

"Yeah, I mean, I guess." I park in the garage and head inside with them. Chris and I go into  his room. He closes the door behind him. As soon as it closes completely, I realize I've never been in his place before. At least not in his room. Like, alone with him. He sits at his keyboard and starts playing random chords to warm up, like he did last time. I notice how much closer we are this time. When he was at my place. We had a few inches of empty bench between us. Here, however, our bodies are touching. His leg is touching my leg and his arm is brushing against the skin of mine. I take out my phone and open the lyrics. He starts playing, and I sing along. 

Here I am
Floating in emerald sea
Keep me dancing
Keep me as still as can be
And I try to keep the balance right
And I try but it feels like wasted time

But these heavy hands
They're pulling me down on my chest
Latching on, coloring all of my flesh
Quietly, you hover over me
And I fight but it feels like wasted time

Say goodnight
I know that I'm swallowed in sea
We collide, colors that devour me
Just say goodnight
I'm already down
I cry
Already down

Already down
And I cry
Already down

And I try
And I try
But it feels like wasted

Chris's POV

When she sings, she closes her eyes. Her head shakes every now and then, and she brings her hands up to her chest, almost touching it. Every note is perfectly on pitch, and her one is absolutely beautiful. I've heard her sing before, but never live. Never so close to me. When I hit the final chord, we sit there in awe for a bit. 

"I'm... wow." I say.

"Yeah... I'm wow too," she replies. 

"I'm so surprised we got it on the first try," I say with a laugh. She giggles too. Fucking adorable.

"Yeah, same. I thought we would need to do it at least 3 times before going though the whole thing." 

We sit there in silence for a few minutes. I look over at her. Her (e/c) eyes are darting around my room, and she's bouncing her knee. I put my hand on it to stop it from bouncing.