The Ringing (Very Slow Updates!)

Chapter Ten - Meeting Tony

Chapter Ten - Meeting Tony

 

 Shay’s POV

 

          I sat on the beach after Cale left waiting for my clothes to dry as I thought back on what happened. Did I really almost kiss him? What was going on with me? I wasn’t suppose to like him, yet here I was debating with myself on whether or not I did; I had to admit he was nice to look at and he seemed like a genuinely nice person, but was that enough? Was it enough to allow myself to put my heart on the line only to have it stomped on and torn to pieces when he decided to let me go and pick one of the other girls? Was I ready for that kind of hurt; that kind of heartache? I had never fallen in love before; never even came close to it.

          I didn’t want to feel like this, to be debating what I should do; I wasn’t supposed to let myself get to this point, my plan was starting to crumble and I didn’t know if I should let it or try and put it back together. Everyone else seemed to think that I should just give it a shot, well Ali and Liz did at least and to me that’s practically everyone; I just didn’t know if it was worth it to put myself out there and actually give Cale a shot or not. I cursed myself for not having more experience in the relationship department; maybe if I’d had my heart broken before I would know what it felt like and know if it was worth it or not to take the risk of it happening again.

          Sighing I knew that I had to make up my mind and make it up soon; there were just so many things that I still needed to sort out with myself before I could allow myself to jump headfirst into the mating pool. I guess it wouldn’t hurt to just let him in a little; let him see who the real me was. That’s what he wanted, wasn’t it? I didn’t actually have to fall for the guy to let him in; I could just be friends with him, yeah, just friends was a good start. How long would he be willing to stay just friends though? I mean we did almost just kiss in the pond, from my experience friends didn’t look at each other the way we just did minutes ago; god this was so confusing! Could I already be falling for him when I really didn’t even know him? No, it had to be something else, some hormonal drive that takes over all women at some point in time in their life; he was hot so could you really blame me for almost kissing him?

          My internal debate was simply putting me in a bad mood; a mood that I didn’t want to allow myself to feel when I was here, when I was at my sanctuary. Deciding that I would try the ‘just friends’ tactic for now I reached over and put on my shoes before pushing myself to my feet; I grabbed my phone off the ground before making my way back to the path and starting back to the house. By the time I made it back to the house I was surprised to find only a few girls in the living room watching TV and since Liz was one of them I joined them sitting next to her on the couch after a quick stop at my room to change my clothes. For now I would just have to forget about what happened at the cliff and go back to my normal routine of just being my closed off self until I could figure out what I wanted to do.