joshler oneshots

wolves and sunflowers and music notes

summary:

my friends and i, we got a lotta problems.

or:
tyler and josh want to forget. they look for the second best thing.

words: 580

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one.
and another.

tyler puts the purple pills in his mouth, and drowns them in a glass of water.

his head spins, but all he can think of are soft petaled daises and languid sunshine and warm, inviting eyes.

he can almost feel the warmth of the sun on his skin.

the fear is crippling cold, and he doesn't quite know where it comes from.

water dribbles out from his lips. it's stained purple.

his phone lights up and a generic ringtone echos through tyler's cloudy head.

he stares at it as it continues to ring.

it stops with a sudden and loud beep, and josh's voice paints everything dark blue and red, sensing shivers down the poor boy's spine.

his voice is tinny as it plays softly out of his phone speakers, but it smoothes tyler out.

it's a short message. he lets tyler know that he's coming over.

tyler goes upstairs and runs shaky fingers over the black ink on his arms and his head turns and rolls and crashes in 10 different hues.

his window opens, and josh tumbles through the small space, pulling off his shoes.

tyler gives him a bottle of water.

josh swallows a purple pill.
two.

he gives tyler a lazy smirk, and grabs his hand.

they jump out of the window.

josh hoists tyler into the tree, the ragged bark scratching at his hands as he clambers towards the little treehouse.

josh's boots click on the wooden floor as he lies down with a soft sigh.

tyler joins him.

the roof not far above is made of a sheet of unused glass.
tyler looks beyond it, and he hears the soft orange pink platter of gentle rain and the quiet green of josh's breathing.

the water on the glass swirls together, and tyler finds wolves and sunflowers and music notes in the shapes they make.

he holds josh's hand.

josh rolls onto his side, and his soft hair tickles tyler's cheek and his breath is warm against his neck.

"don't you ever just want to forget?"

there is a lavender haze over their minds now, and his voice fades to a whisper.

"i'm terrified," tyler whispers back.
"i'm terrified of reality and what's in it. i don't have the effort to deal with it at all."

he sighs, a pale blue sound.

his voice gets even quieter.

"i'm sick of it, you know?"
his voice cracks.
"i'm really sick of it. i'm sick of it all."

josh's breathing is more choked, and he knows he must be falling into a different place, where things are darker and he remembers angry red and ominous blue greens.

and tyler doesn't know what to think anymore.

josh just wants to forget.

hearts are twisting in confusion and simple uncontentment.

"sometimes," josh's voice is shaky,
"sometimes i don't to live anymore."

tyler's heart jumps a little and he turns towards josh.

his eyes are so full of agony and self doubt, insecurity and tyler's head is spinning because the dark eyelashes and mocha brown of josh's eyes shouldn't be able to contain the amount of hurt they do.

"i'm confused, tyler." his voice is small.

tyler moves to intertwine their fingers.

there are nail shaped indents where josh's nails had bitten into his palms and there are scratchmarks on josh's neck.

"i know." his breath ghosts softly over josh's face.

the rain pitter patters on the dirty glass ceiling and all they want to do is forget.