The Lone She-Wolf

Chapter 13

Diane's POV

After following everyone into the house at a slightly slower pace, I passed them by as they headed for the kitchen and ran straight up to the room that Andrew had given me. After closing the door softly behind me, I lean on it for support as I replay everything that I'd told Andrew and felt a wave of grief larger than any I'd felt since I knew I'd lost my mother well before I had ended her life.

Mate will still love and protect us. - My wolf tried to comfort me as I hugged myself as the tears built up within my eyes.

You saw how he acted after I told him... there's no way that he'd want us now. - I reply as a silent sob wracks my frame and I instinctively cover my mouth just in case I might let one out.

You're wrong, he will keep us... we are worth it to him. - My wolf pleads with me as she tries to keep down the walls that I've already started to form around our heart.

"When are you going to learn... we're not worth anything to anyone." I reply softly as I move away from the door and grab my sports bag that I use for when I took trips back into Rogue territory, "Our own mate wouldn't even speak to us after we told him only the barest facts about our past... what makes you think that he'll be able to handle the rest if he can't talk to us about what little we've told him?"

My wolf merely whimpered at my statement because looking back at our past she knew that it was a long shot that anyone would ever be willing to stay with us after knowing our complete past... because even though Cleo was our Blood-Sister she didn't know everything about us. It hurt us to not be able to tell all our secrets to someone, but there were just somethings that other people didn't need to know. Not even Claude, who housed me for many years of my life, not even he knew all of my dirty little secrets... but he even though I'd known he was curious about my past, he had never expected nor asked me about any of it. I went about my dresser draws and my closet, grabbing most of my jeans, numerous amounts of my shirts, undergarments and stashing a pair of flats, a pair of tennis shoes and my spare set of boots within my large sports bag.

A few silent tears fall from my eyes, freezing as I freeze my heart from the pain that I will soon be forced to feel. I'd had always hoped that I would never find my mate, not because I didn't want one... but because it would be to painful to lose him, it was going to destroy my heart to let him go like this. At least what little of my heart I still had after all of the things I've done. I didn't deserve a mate after everything I've done... I deserved to have RK find me, and I deserved the punishment in which he would deal out to me for the injustice he thinks I've done against him. I hefted my bag over my shoulder, looking around to make sure there wasn't anything else that I might need, for where I was going, it was usually best if you carried around clothes for your back. Anything else would get you killed over it.

Must we go back? I don't want to spend the rest of our life in that darkness... I want to stay with our mate. - My wolf says softly within my mind, heartbreak filled within her voice.

"We can't stay here, he doesn't want us and RK would kill him as well as his pack if and when he found us here... we can't stay." I reply in an almost tired manner as I use a piece of parchment to write a note for Andrew and leave it within an envelope that has his name scrawled across the smooth side, "We don't deserve him, we never did, so we must protect him from our past... and from ourselves. The Darkness has always been our home... and it always will."

You don't want to believe that! - My wolf whined even as she laid on her stomach and laid her head sadly upon her front paws.

"Just because I don't want to doesn't mean that I don't have to... we were given the short end of the stick from the moment we were brought into this world." I inform her as I leave my room silently make my way just as silently down the stairs and out the front door without having made any sound to let anyone know that I was leaving.

Can we at least see our Blood-Sister before we go back into that dark place? Can we at least see the only light we have left? - My wolf whimpers to me in pain as I can just imagine the tears falling from her eyes within my mind as I got onto my motorcycle... taking one last look  at the house that I would have shared with my Mate if things hadn't gone the way they had. If my life had been different from what had been handed to me all those years ago when a Witch tore my family apart... and yet, shockingly, I never bore a grudge against the witches as a whole.

"We'll stop by Cleo's... we'll tell her good-bye before we disappear back into the Darkness that we call home." I whisper to her before riding away from the one place I really wanted to stay.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"DIANE!" Cleo shouted when she burst through the front door and threw her pregnant self into the air making both Mike and I worry, but knowing full well that I'll catch her gently, "I didn't know that you were coming for a visit, why didn't you call me before hand?"

"I wanted to surprise you." I tell her with a soft smile as I carefully spin her around a little, "Look at you, I'm gone for only a month and you're already looking like you only have another month or so left until your pup is born."

"Pups... there's two!" Cleo tells me excitedly as she hugs me tightly again before allowing me to put her feet gently on the ground, "I have 7 weeks left until they're born, we're having one girl and one boy!"

"You're going to have a handful Mike, I almost feel sorry for you." I snicker in Mike's direction as he rolls his eyes at me playfully and then glares for my amusement.

"What makes you think she isn't going to call you over whenever she can so that you can babysit for us when they get older?" Mike threatens devilishly.

"Touche." I reply before sticking my tongue out at him... only with these two did I truly feel normal.

I spent the rest of the evening helping Cleo walk around, getting her snacks, trying to help her figure out what names she wanted for her pups, always with Mike never far off but trusting of me because I was her Blood-Sister and I stayed as close to Cleo as I could up until she fell asleep on the couch next to me, clutching my arm tightly until Mike helped dig her nails out of my skin.

"Good night sis... I'll see you later." I whisper as I kissed her forehead, a saddened expression upon my face, right before Mike carried her up the stairs and into their room.

I headed out the front door, feeling more and more like I was killing the part of me that Cleo spent so much time rebuilding into my character. I felt tears making their way down my cheeks silently as I held back the emotions that I was feeling. I took several deep breaths when I reached my motorcycle, forced myself to get onto it and then noticed that Mike was watching me from a few feet away.

"I don't want to be away from Cleo for too long... but I had to ask you an important question." Mike tells me and I watch him carefully, "Why did it feel like you were trying to tell her good-bye?"

"Because I'm leaving." I say bluntly, not really one to use sarcasm or any tone that would seem like it, "Things... they didn't work out back at the Crescent Moon pack. My mate, Andrew... I told him about some of my past. He couldn't take it I guess."

"I see..." Mike murmurs as he nods his head carefully in thought, "Any chance I can ask you not to go to far?"

"I'll swing by once I send my past back to where it belongs. RG, she was only one of my problems and RK... well he's just the last loose end that I need to take care of." I reply with a dark look taking over my features that reminded Mike of how I used to be, I could tell by the way he watched me.

"Jut promise me that you won't forget about her... she loves you as if you were really her older sister." Mike says simply as he half turns to head back into the house.

"I could never forget her..." I say as I look down at my right hand in order to look at the scar resting within the center of my palm, "I may not be able to promise much, but I can promise that I love her dearly and  will never forget her... if anything happens, her father has my emergency number. A number that only he has in case Cleo was at risk."

"Be safe... or should I be sending that prayer to the wolves that dare to get in your way?" Mike says with a wave as he walks toward the house.

"Good-bye Mike... you will always be like a brother to me." I whisper before riding away, hoping that the wind hadn't carried my broken words to him, but knowing that I needed to at least say them to him before I disappeared into the Darkness.