Lost Hope

Solution

As i sit in my room, my hands still shaking and my breathing heavy, my heartbeat loud and fast. It's 2:30 mom and dad rushed in when they heard my screams. Another nightmare.
It's been a week, everyone comes by every day to check up on me or to see me. I can't go back yet. I don't want them to see me like this. So fragile and useless, i can't sit up, much less stand on my own or even walk.
I want to see them. I really do miss them, it feels so lonely here.
Mom sits in bed with me, she hugs me as she tells me everything will alright. Will it really? My whole life has fallen apart once again, just as I was getting better everything just crumbled.

My life was getting better, I had friends, I felt like it could all last for ever... and now... I'm back to the same place. 

As the days pass my wounds feel less painful, they still hurt like fucking hell but it's definitely not as bad as it was at first. "Lucy you can't hide in your room forever." Zeref says as he stares at me with curiosity. "Natsu keeps bugging me saying 'Why won't she let us see her? We're her friends.' They all have, and believe me, they won't give up." I stare at the floor while I think. 

Should I let them in or leave with out a trace? my anxiety and nightmares have gotten bad, I'm starting to see things... I can't let them worry about me, I need help.

"I want to go to  Starlight Mental Asylum..." I say loud enough for Zeref to hear. "W-what?" he says dumbfounded. "I want to go to the asylum, I have been considering it since I woke up at the hospital and all the visions got worse. I don't think I can handle all of this on my own..." He stares at me with a sad look. "Lucy... what will the others say?" 

"They won't say anything, they can't find out." He stares me in disbelief, "Lucy you can't be serious?" I am, I have to do what is necessary to get better, if I do... a nice and happy ending with Natsu and our friends.

it's the only solution...