I fell in Love with a Jerk [ON HOLD]

Chapter 9- Almost

Chapter 9- Almost

The next day, Saturday, I woke up at around six o'clock which was too early for my liking. Every Saturdays and Sundays, I would usually wake up past eight o'clock. But right now, I don’t know what happened. I didn't even set an alarm.

I tried to go back to sleep but no matter what I do, I couldn't sleep anymore. I then remembered last night, Xavier having a nightmare. 

I slowly sat on my bed and remained sitting for who knows how long.

I don’t know what to think anymore. But there's one thing that I was sure, he's troubled. I wanted to help him, but I thought I was stepping a line already whenever I asked him about it. I wanted him to talk about it, but I felt like I was intruding his life whenever I do something for him to open up with me. I know I shouldn’t force him to talk about it and I won’t force him to. I just want him to know that I’m just here, that I can listen. Because I know the feeling of having no one to talk to about something that really bothers you.

It's like carrying too much weight that it felt like you can’t breathe anymore. It's like you were put on a small square room with no windows. And the longer you carry those weight in your shoulders, the smaller the room  became, making it too hard to breathe, too hard to stand alone, until all you just want to do is curve into a ball and scream and cry. You wanted to hold onto something to keep standing, but what if there's no one to hold on to?

That's why I wanted him to know he can count on me. That I can be the one he can hold on to.

They said Xavier's the youngest son, therefore he have a brother or brothers, right? I know nothing about him or his family. I only knew Aunt Melly was Mom's best friend, but other than that, I knew nothing about them anymore.

Ever since he stayed with us, not once had I seen or heard him talk neither to his parents nor to his brother. Call me creepy but whenever we're in one place, I can’t help but to glance at him often even though I tried so hard not to. And whenever we're apart, he's usually out for parties or school. But I'm not a stalker, okay? It just so happens that we're usually in one place aside from school and his night life.

I just wanted to help.

Hm... You like him?

What?! No! Never! No! Gosh! No! I would never like someone like him. I mean, yeah, he’s attractive...but he's just so rude and rude and rude and rude and weird! And I already like someone else! Nathan! I like Nathan. Yes. I like Nathan. He's good to me. He cares about me. He said he loves me. Yeah, right. I like Nathan. He looks good, he's cool, he's fun to be with, he's friendly, he's funny, and he’s sweet. We actually have a dinner date on Saturday next week. And if he'll ask me to be his girlfriend again, I will give him my sweet yes. No postponing this time. Because... I like him. Okay? I like him. I like Nathan! That's right. I like Nathan.

Hm. Really?

"Of course! I like Nathan! I like him!" I honestly like him. I just don't like how my brain dared to compare the two.

I don't even like Xavier. Yes I like to be friends with him. But not like 'like', like 'really like'. You get that right? Ugh.

My door burst open, standing there was my brother with a frown on his face, and with a long list in his hand.

"Okay Sis. Relax. No one's gonna take Nathan away from you. Chill." he slowly raised both of his hands while looking cautiously at me. He slowly crept in my room and placed the list on my desk, still looking at me like I was a predator.

My brows knitted in confusion. "What are you doing?"

"You okay now?"

"What?"