Becoming Beautiful (Wattys2014)

| Chapter 6 |

Song for this chapter: Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol

Chapter 6

I stared at the ceiling, about ninety-five percent awake. Days like this are common, but they're usually not this bad. In case you're wondering what I'm talking about, I don't want to go to school. Last night, I ended up going to sleep at eight o'clock because I was sad, and I slept through the night peacefully, hoping that I wouldn't be sad when I got up, but I am.

Days like this, I'm sick of being alone all the time. I'm sick of being walked all over. Days like this, I'm sick of being ignored. I try and I try hard to get people to like me and to talk to me but it's too hard. I turn on my side before sitting up, tears forming in the corner of my eyes. I don't want to go; I really don't want to go.

Making myself stand up, I walked towards the shower with my clothes in hand.

I cried into the shower; I cried as I got out of the shower; I cried as I got ready for school. I didn't bother to eat breakfast, knowing that I'd probably puke it back up. I rinsed my face, hoping the tear streaks would leave but to my dismay, my eyes were red and puffy. They stood out against my pale skin.

I get into my car and put my bag in the passenger's seat, the words repeating over and over in my head: I don't want to go. I miss my mom. I miss my dad. I want to go back to sleep.

So far this year, I haven't missed any days. We aren't that far into the school year, but most of the kids already missed a day or two. I know my mother wouldn't be proud if I decided to skip school because I wasn't feeling up to it. I don't know if she knows that I go unnoticed at school to the point where some teachers forget my name. I don't have the nerve to tell her, she'd look at me with pity in her eyes. That's when she's here, of course.

As I stepped into the school building, I knew it was a mistake. My eyes connected with Ronnie's and he let out a snort, his eyes taunting me. My shoulders slumped as I walked in the direction of the library, the only place I can actually go and sit. I don't like Tuesdays very much. I have study hall first period and the only place I'm allowed to go is the library, which isn't always the most exciting- especially when I'm too tired to even pick up a book. Most kids would take advantage of it and sleep in but I know that I would just stay home, without a doubt, if I were to sleep in.

Sniffling, I stared at the floor as my bag hung loosely on my shoulder. The bell rung loudly, piercing my ears and catching me by surprise. "Kenna!"

I turn at the sound of my name being called. My eyes are greeted with Marissa who is jogging down the hallway, a book in her hand. The hallway was clearing out slowly and teenagers were making their way to their classes. Once she's in my vicinity, she smiles at me. She's not out of breath at all. Figures. "Kenna, are you..."

I was confused as to why she stopped mid-sentence until I realized that I probably looked like I crawled out from beneath the earth. "Yeah?" My voice and eyes were pleading with her not to bring it up. Please.

The corners of her lips turned upward into a smile, but it didn't quite reach her eyes, which held a sense of curiosity. "Are you on your way to the library?"

I wanted to let out a sigh of relief. She didn't bring it up. She said absolutely nothing about it. I nodded my head, blinking my eyes tiredly as I offered her a smile. "Yeah, I'm on my way there."

"Can you please return this book for me?" she asked me, handing a book to me. I nodded, accepting the book without glancing at the cover.

"I will. And you should get to class, you're already late," I told her.

"Am not, the late bell didn't ring yet," she stated the moment the shrill sound of the bell reached our ears. She walked backwards, her strides long, thanks to her long legs. "I'll see you at lunch?"