Love on the Radio

Chapter 31 - The Beginning

When you're trying to manage your life all at once, it tends to be that you ignore some things. I ignore writing, because if I paint, then I'm too lazy to write, and if there's school, I just count the seconds and suddenly they're hours and I have done nothing. 

I made myself write today, and this is what happened. I'm sorry it's a short chapter, but my goal is to just write, and then later, when the story is ready, re-write it. I'm a bit of a perfectionist (when it comes to writing or painting), so I want to do everything once and perfectly, but I'm becoming used to the idea of just writing, getting my thoughts on paper, and then making them better.

Chapter 31 - The beginning

“So, you’re telling me you don’t know his name,” said Ramona as we walked towards the radio station. She has died strakes of her hair blue, her eyes smoky and fierce.

“I know nothing,” I shrugged my shoulders and took a sip of ice tea. “But I know you can help me. He can’t handle you. You keep me grounded. It’s a win-lose and we’re on the winning side. There’s nothing wrong with it.”

“Huh? That’s cool with me. I like to win.” She opened the door and we stepped inside. Luckily, I didn’t have to explain who the guy was, because the first thing we both saw was the jerk. He was sitting behind his desk, and hearing the sound of the door closing he raised his head and stared right at us.

At the sight of Ramona his eyes lit up and a smirk appeared on his lips.

“Well, hello!” he said and leaned back in his chair. “Cats drag all kinds of things in these days. Somebody should stop it.”

“Witty,” Ramona muttered and gave a fake smile. “What’s your name, anyways?”

“Why? Do you want to make a shirt with my name on it?” He raised his eyebrow, still smiling.

“Great thinking! That’s exactly what I wanted to do,” she nodded. “Which colour do you think would suit me best? Black? Or is that colour too happy?”

“Purple,” he simply answered.

“Is it your favourite colour or something?” Ramona asked, and pushed her away from her fac. Then she took her phone from her pocket, and started texting. I wanted to know who she was sending those texts, but it seemed like she never pressed send.

“It fits with your blue hair,” he shrugged.

Ramona put her phone away and walked closer. She placed her hands on the desk and leaned closer.

“What about my eyes?” she challenged him. That was followed by him staring into her eyes. I didn’t know what to do. It seemed they were getting along better than him and me.

“They’re fine,” he said and shrugged his shoulders, again.

“Fine,” said Ramona and shrugged her shoulders as well. To me, it seemed quite adorable. She looked over her shoulder to me, and gave me a look. I thought she might want to make a big exit, so I took the lead and she followed. “I never got your name!” she shouted from the corridor and ordered me stop.

“It’s Jack!” came the response.

We continued walking towards the studio room. I heard Ramona whisper, “More like jackass.” And I laughed. “But I am totally getting that T-shirt done,” she added.

The show went perfectly. Ramona gave smart answers to those who messaged or called us, and we had a lot of fun. I had almost forgotten how great of a person she was. Part of me wanted to desperately ask about Howard, but it didn’t seem appropriate.

I hadn’t asked her to come just so I could ask about Howard, or just use her in general for my own good. She was my friend. She had already agreed to put up with that jerk Jack; I didn’t want to ask more from her, because I hadn’t given anything in return.

I did tell Ramona how I still had no clue who the secret admirer could be, that made her laugh till her stomach hurt. It seemed funny to her that there was someone out there who I may or may not know that had a crush on me. The thought of stranger liking me was even weirder, because how could a stranger see me as someone they wanted to get to know better, someone they already liked even though we had not even talked to each other yet.

I was glad I made her laugh. Finally I could laugh with her.

Suddenly she mentioned Jack. I still hadn’t gotten over the fact that Jack and Howard looked similar. Actually they didn’t, but Jack reminded me of him. And I kind of hated myself for that.

“I mean, he did look cute,” she giggled. “If just...if it weren’t for the fact that he was quite annoying. But I guess that’s what I like about him.”

Silence.

“Like?” I asked.

“Well...no...yes? I don’t know! Maybe?” she shrugged and hid her face. I saw she was blushing. “You have to agree, he is adorable. Especially the smile.”

“Love at first sight?” I nudged her.

“Better than love on the radio,” she mocked back. “At least he’s real.”

I was taken aback. It wasn’t that Ramona had insulted me, it just had never occurred to me that somebody might be pulling a prank on me.

“You’re right,” I nodded. “I don’t even know if he’s real, yet I’m so invested in finding out.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. It was a joke. I was joking. Sorry.” Ramona started apologizing, but I wasn’t mad at her, I tried telling that, but she still felt guilty.

“I mean, I have thought of that, but not thought thought. It seemed better to believe somebody liked me. It always seems better to believe something that might not be true,” I said. “I wanted it to be a fairytale, and when it wasn’t Howard, it wasn’t Jace, it’s not Joe, or Evan, then who is it?”

“Nobody said it wasn’t Howard, or Joe, or Evan, though the latter might be kind of impossible. Yeah,” she giggled.

“What? Do you know something I don’t?” I needed to know everything. She had to tell me.

“Evan’s gay,” she said, smiling. “He might not know it yet, or admit it, but he kind of got a crush on Joe. Yeah, you could say he was jealous.” She took a sip from the ice tea I had bought earlier. “Yuck, that’s too sweet!”

“Well, I can scratch that name off my list, then. I still don’t know who it is. I don’t even know who I want it to be. Oh, god, I’m so confused.”

It was time for us to go home. We were about to leave, when Jack said from behind his desk, “I met your admirer today.”

Ramona and I both stopped in our tracks. “Say what?” she said, raising both her eyebrows.

“I like secrets, and I’m going to keep this one.” He stood from his seat and put his leather jacket on. He walked past us, when Ramona put her hand on his shoulder.

“You will tell me, if not today, then soon.” It sounded like a threat, but none of them was serious. Jack smirked while staring at Ramona, whose eyes were glimmering. He licked his bottom lip and winked, then shook her hand off of his shoulder and exited the building.

We watched him disappear into the night.

“Yes, I like him. I definitely like him,” she said.