Chapter Twenty-One

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"I can't go in there" I shake my head, looking up at Kyle's house.

"Mum" Freddy narrows his eyes.

I roll my eyes as a response before jumping out of the car. The walk of shame to his front door makes my stomach churn. Freddy presses the doorbell button quickly.

"I'm going to be sick" I clench my jaw, hearing Kyle's footsteps ascend to the door.

When the door swings open, I hold my breath. Kyle greets me with a smile.

"Lexi?" He says, "you're back?"

I release my breath, forcing a smile to mimic his. Freddy stands silent with a straight face and wide eyes.

"Sorry for bothering you" I bite down on my lower lip, "can we come in?"

"Yeah, of course," Kyle nods, walking through his house, to the living room. We follow him and take a seat on the sofa. Kyle looks over to Fred. "Hi, I'm Kyle, I don't think we've met"

"H-hi..." Freddy stutters, his eyes wide.

"This is Freddy, my son..." I introduce, forcing my heart to pound.

"Mum, I'll wait outside" Freddy lowers his voice before walking away from Kyle and I.

I revert my gaze to Kyle whose eyes are wide.

"You...you have a child?" He blinks.

I nod "I have three kids...One I adopted from China and the other from Bangladesh...Freddy is biologically mine" I find myself rambling.

"He's got to be at least sixte-" Kyle starts.

"He's yours" I interrupt, my voice low and shaky.

There's a moment of silence as Kyle sits frozen before he finally says "excuse me?"

"It was before you left Seattle...Junior year when I found out I was pregnant" I explain.

"What?" He furrows his brows.

"That's why I let you go, Kyle...That's why we broke up" I continue, "I was sixteen and pregnant and confused and I knew you would have come back if you knew. Because you always do the right thing...and I didn't want you to give up all your dreams like I did mine...it wasn't fair on you"

"Hold on" he rubs his lips with the palm of his hands. "What?" He repeats, "I mean...What?"

"I know it's a lot to take in" I nod slowly.

"All this time and you...." He trails off, "this whole time...when we...you didn't think to mention you had my kid" He raises his voice.

"I'm sorry, I was a kid myself, I didn't know what to do" my eyes begin to well up with tears. "The more time that passed, the harder it became to tell you..."

He looks up at me in fury, jumping up on his two feet.

"I've missed every day of my kid's life because you didn't know what to do?"

"I was a kid! I had to drop out of school, raise this kid on my own, I was confused and angry and I didn't know how stupid I was being till it was too late" I stand up, meeting his gaze.

"you should have told me!" He yells.

"I know," warm salty tears stream down my cheeks.

"No, I don't think you do" he shakes his head.

"What was I supposed to do? Tell you that I was pregnant just before you moved away?" I cry.

"Yes!" Kyle throws his arms in the air.

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