Chapter Sixteen

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For Christmas vacation, mum, Tom, the kids and I, went to Miami for two weeks. Freddy was twelve, Patra was six and Ling was three. On the final day of our trip, Tom stayed in the hotel with the kids while mum and I visited the local coffee shop. While sitting at the table, waiting for mum to return with my short black, she finally returned but without my coffee to my dismay, instead, she brought something else.

"Alexandria" she stood next to the man. "The waitress recommended that I see the tourist shop they have. I was walking through the front door when I saw him looking at key rings, I'll go get us some coffee's, can you believe it?"

"Lexi" He greeted with a wide grin.

His facial expression was a mix of pain and happiness. After all, the last time I saw him, we were naked on his couch. I hadn't seen him since our one night stand together.

"Hey, Kyle" my eyes were wide and stunned.

"You look...amazing as always" Kyle kissed my cheek. "Nine years is too long, Lex"

Had it been that long? My pact that I made in his apartment, never see him again, only lasted nine years.

I couldn't help but examine his face. He had changed so much yet so little. I remember thinking how scary it was how similar he looked to Freddy. It was an unsettling feeling, seeing the man that I had once been so close to yet have nothing in common with anymore.

I left a note and never called after our last encounter. He wanted something more but I couldn't give it to him. He was angry at me, and I was too uncomfortable and consumed by guilt to tell him the truth.

"Nine years" I muttered under my breath as he took a seat at the table. "So what are you doing here?"

"Travelling" he responded quickly.

So much has changed I guess. The Kyle I knew rather die then travel.

"You hate to travel" I remember.

"It's for work" Kyle explained.

"On your Christmas vacation?" I raised a brow.

"What's with the interrogation?" Kyle furrowed his brows. He then sighed. "I'm twenty-eight years old... I haven't had Christmas Vacations since college"

"I wasn't interrogating you" I defend.

"Oh really?" He scoffed, "geez, can't we have a normal conversation"

"Well, I'm not the one being difficult" I rolled my eyes.

"We're adults now, Lexi" he reminded me, "how is it that we can't even sit down and have a normal conversation like grown-ups?"

"...You've changed" I bite the in corner of my lip.

"Well, I'm not the only one," Kyle said roughly before jumping up from his seat. "Tell your mum that it was nice seeing her again." With that, he stormed away.

I sighed, slamming my head against the table. I remember feeling angry with myself that day. After all, I was responsible for how things between Kyle and I turned out, right? Maybe if I had told him from the start about Freddy, maybe things would be different? Or better yet, maybe if we used a god damn condom in the first place... I grit my teeth in anger, get that thought out of your head, Alexandria, I tell myself.

A minute late Mum returned with the coffees.

"Where did Kyle go?" she asked.

I snapped my head up, taking the coffee from her hand violently. "I don't know"

Mum folded her arms before shooting me a knowing look. She just knew that I screwed up somehow - Like I usually do. I was the problem, I knew that. After all, I always am, right?

So, I stood up from seat and left the coffee shop. I walked quickly to the closest park which is where I found him, sitting at a bench, staring at the trees ahead. I stopped in my tracks and sighed. I knew he would be here. I guess some things never change.

"I'm sorry" I swallowed my ego and took a seat beside him.

Without looking at me, Kyle said, "we've known each other since we were kids so why is it that you insist on treating me like a stranger?"

I looked down, ashamed of myself and all the deceit.

"I don't know" I admitted.

"What happened to us?" Kyle sighed.

I just wanted to kiss his lips and tell him everything. I wanted to tell him about Freddy and how I'm a high school drop out and how I'm in love with him but I couldn't.

"I guess we just grew up, drifted apart..." I shrugged. "Kyle, I'm so so sorry"

"Oh year, for what?" he cocked a brow.

"For hurting you...for being a constant disappointment-"

"Feeling guilty about things you shouldn't worry about, babbling on like a complete idiot," he cracked a smile. "Don't be sorry for anything, you've done nothing wrong"

Tell him. Stop it with all the lies and deceit and tell him the truth, for once. Doesn't he deserve that much? Doesn't Freddy deserve to know his father? I ignored that little voice in my head.

"I screwed you over on multiple occasions" I reminded him, "besides, you don't know half the things I've done"

"I know all the good you have in you and that my dear, outweighs whatever crap you've done in the past" Kyle assured me, "redo?" he requested.

I nodded, "redo"

Kyle took my hand and squeezed it gently as I laid my head on his shoulder. Together we sat on that park bench and watched the sunset together, just like we used to. And that's how we left things. After that day, I honestly thought I'd never see him again, but things with Kyle are never predictable.

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