Odd [re-writing]

37. The Aftermath Cliché

                In which, we finally get to see what happens next and everything will fall into place

               Plot twist: nothing ever truly falls into place that quick, right?

The aftermath was anything but comfortable. In the plane ride back home, I forced myself to sleep despite the chaos inside my head and more importantly, my heart. He said it was a mistake, Andy. What else could he have meant by that except that he doesn't feel the same way?

At that thought, my heart clenched on itself again so hard and painful that I had to bend over and rub at my chest. I could feel the familiar stinging build-up at my tear ducts, the way the nerves in my forehead throbbed and knew that I was so close to breaking down.

At one point, I stood to go calm myself in the rest room, only for Percy to try and follow after me. Noticing him standing right after I did, I took a detour and went straight to adults' cabin and towards my mother. She wasn't stunned at the least, and instead gave me a blanket and told me to come sit beside her if I was so tired. I took the blanket easily and cocooned myself on the free seat right across her. Pulling up the hood of my sweater, I wrapped the blanket around me and turned towards the window.

"Oh, Percy, do you need anything, dear?" Mrs Hailey's voice came from the other side of the cabin. I could faintly hear Percy muttering something as he walked away on the padded aisle. I hugged myself tighter and willed my eyes to shut, my head to hush and my heart to stop aching. Some things are not so simple to achieve.

***

When we arrived in our house after declining a late lunch from the Danes, I immediately shut my windows, drew my curtains and buried myself under the comforters. It was still humid even if it already was October (if it were Michigan, we'd already have bundled ourselves in sweaters). I felt all too hot and all too sweaty and flushed and was briefly tempted to turn the AC on although it would be such a waste. But I couldn't open the windows. I was so scared I'd see Percy's face. I was so scared I'd remember too much and too well.

Lips on mine, soft and warm and they stung. They lingered. Like sparks after fireworks, smoke after candles. It was such a good memory, but filled with pain too.

I felt a smile creeping on my face upon remembering how he said he appreciated me.

But then... he did say it was a mistake.

I let out a muffled scream through my comforters and pulled at my hair. How stupid can you get?? Stop these false hopes. He said it was a mistake. He said sorry.

Well, he didn't exactly say sorry yet, did he?

I peeked out from under my covers and at my shut windows. The curtains heavy over them, not letting the late afternoon sun slink in, I could almost imagine Percy trying to climb over again.

Maybe if I open the windows a little bit, he'd come and try to...

NO, ANDY!

I pull back my hand from the latch and cursed myself. God damn it. Now I'm fighting with myself. In times like this, I need to be strong. Whatever else could I do now that I am so deeply and painfully conscious of my affections for Percy.

And Percy! Of all human beings, it just had to be Percy. Annoying, rude, nasty and fickle Percy. Percy who agitated me on a daily basis just because it was fun to tease me. Percy who made fun of me stuttering because a freshman came over to ask me what club I am in. Percy who ... Percy who held my hand through panic attacks. Percy who cooked for me when I asked him to. Percy who shared his dreams and secrets and let me in inside his little torn walls. Percy who kissed me on the beach after panicked, thinking he'd lost me...