Heart's desire (Marilyn Manson fanfiction)

Chapter 13. It's been a while~

So it's been a while, months even. I haven't seen Marilyn in all this time, the last time I saw him was when he left me at my doorstep and told be goodbye. Things have gotten pretty bad since then, I haven't been sleeping or eating very well, I refuse to go to school and talk to my friends let alone my family and there's nothing anyone can do about it, not even me. The only thing I want in this world is him... Marilyn.

Today is just another day at home upstairs in my room with my door closed and my curtains shut, I like to keep everyone out and keep to myself it's better this way.
Suddenly I hear a knock on my door which causes me to jump up in my bed,

"Ye-yes?..." I say

"Claire honey? It's Dad." He says

I sigh in disappointment, "What do you want?" I ask in a stubborn tone

"Can I come in please? It's important." He pleads

I groan then get out of my bed, I head to the door and open it. Then without saying anything to my dad I walk straight back to my bed and hop in it again.
I look up towards my dad and see that he has his phone in his hand as if he were on the phone to someone.

"You said there was something important." I say while continuing to look at my father's phone.

"Honey... I have someone on the phone I want you to talk to, I think they might make you feel better..." He says with hesitation.

"Are you serious? Are you trying to make me talk to a counselor? What the hell dad, this is ridiculous!" I shout at him with such rage in my voice.

A really sad expression appears on my father's face but what he says next shocks me.
"Claire it's not a counselor okay! It-It's Marilyn..." He says

I feel my heart skip a beat and my stomach drop, I feel as though I'm about to throw up. I can't believe I just said all that and Marilyn would have heard! And I can't believe he's on the phone right now! Is this real!?

"Honey it would mean a lot to me if you just spoke to him, please?" He begs

I hesitate and start to feel my anxiety levels rise but none the less Marilyn means the world to me, how could I not talk to him.

I finally reach out my hand for my father's phone and he passes it to me, I slowly raise the phone up towards my ear and take a deep breath in...

"He-hey..." I finally spoke
Once my dad saw me speaking he left my room to give me some privacy.
"Hello Claire" I hear the deep raspy voice if Marilyn Manson reply back

"How've you been?" He asks

"Why would you ask me that? I'm sure my dad has already enlightened you about how I've been, I'm not a fool Marilyn." I reply

"And I don't take you as one, I never have." He replies

"Look, your dad asked me to speak to you because he thinks I can help, is there anything I can do or say to make you feel any better?" He asks

"Ha! are you being serious right now?" I scoff then ask harshly

"Yes of course, why would you ask me that?" He replies

"Because you should already know what to do and what to say to make me feel better, I bet you already know but don't care to say or do it" I reply

"Claire, You know I can't..." He says

"Well then I guess the answers no then, there's nothing you can do or say to make me feel better, because your not willing to give me the one thing in this world that I so desperately desire." I say

"...Claire, please, don't be like this." Marilyn hesitates and replies in a heart broken voice.

"Marilyn this is only hurting me more... I should go" I reply and prepare myself to hang up on the most important person in my life.

"CLAIRE!" I hear him shout my name on the phone.
I don't say anything I just listen and wait anxiously to hear what he has to say.

"Claire I... Well you know... That... UGH! Look Claire I care about you a great deal and to hear that you've been hurting all this time we've been apart well that just crushes me, especially because I know that I'm the reason why your hurting so much. Your right I do know what to say and I do know what to do in order to make you happy again but I honestly don't see anyway of it going well if I do." He says.

"I don't care! I don't care about that okay... Marilyn all I want is you. All I need is you and if you truly cannot give me that then I don't see any way of me getting better because I'm honestly so madly into you that I can't live without you and I know that this may sound as though I'm just another teenage girl confessing their feelings to you but I honestly feel something special for you and I think you do too... Am I right?" I ask

"Claire..." He says

"Am I?" I ask again

"Yes. And you know it." He admits

"Then Marilyn please! Please just tell me exactly what I need to hear, please I beg you!" I reply

He hesitates at first, "Claire I promise you that I will be back for you and that I will try my hardest to makes us work, because I-I... Well I Love you." He finally says

And before I could even reply to that, he hangs up abruptly right after that.

I have so much going through my head right now! Especially the fact that he just said he loved me... Was he telling the truth? Or did he just say that because he knew that was what I wanted to hear? I guess I'll just have to wait and see what happens from here on.

I'll leave it there for now...
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