Heart's desire (Marilyn Manson fanfiction)

Chapter 12. Why is this happening to me?

I get onto the bus with Marilyn and his band and we start to make our way to my house, it'll take a few hours but eventually I will have to part ways with Marilyn, and that will destroy me.

Manson's band were all over the bus, in the bunks, in the kitchen, sitting at the front of the bus, some in the bathroom as well. I guess they all decided to leave Marilyn and I alone so we could be together for the remainder of our time together.

As hard as I tried to be positive and happy for Marilyn, I couldn't be. I was so sad, so depressed by this situation. I don't want to go back home and stay with my parents! I want to stay with Marilyn and be with him for the rest of my life, he means so much to me, I only hope he feels the same way.

I must have had a sad expression or something, because Marilyn could tell I was upset. "I-I don't know what to do..." He finally speaks, which causes me slowly look up to him with tears in my eyes. "Oh Claire please... I can't bare to see you cry." He says in a heart broken voice. "I-I know...I-I'm so...so sorry" I manage to say with a teary voice. "Aww come here." Manson says and pulls me in close to his chest while he wraps his warm arms around me. "I'm going to miss this" I say while sniffling. "Yeah me too, I'm really going to miss you Claire." Manson says while stroking my hair. "I'm going to miss you too, so much!" I say and burst into tears while pushing my face into Manson's chest, he didn't let go he just held me tighter.

After a while, I stop crying and I start to feel better. Marilyn's been cheering me up the whole time and flirting with me which keeps making me blush, gosh I love him aha. He also keeps kissing me, which makes him irresistible and makes me want to jump on him and do him right there! Even though I've never done that with a guy before... I still want to do it with him, I feel like he's the only guy I'd ever want to do it with, he's special.

"What are you thinking about?" I hear Manson ask and I look up to him to see him smirking. "O-oh nothing..." I stutter. "Nothing hey?" He says. I nod my head while smirking at him. "Oh yeah, well I don't believe you." He says. "What do you believe then?" I ask. Manson leans in closer to me and moves his head up towards my ear, "I believe...that you want do get with me right here, right now. Am I right?" He whispers seductively into my ear. I feel my heat skip a beat then pound against my chest and begin to race, I feel my face start to heat up and go red, I was blushing uncontrollably. Marilyn moves his head back slightly so he could see the expression on my face, he had a smug look on his face. "And...what if I did?..." I finally reply. "Then your wish would be my command..." He says while biting down on his bottom lip, ugh that turns me on. I let out a slight sigh and Marilyn pounces his lips onto mine, he kisses me passionately.

Things started to get a bit heated up now, While Marilyn and I were making out like crazy I decided to get a bit rougher so I bit down on his bottom lip, Marilyn groaned a little "Bite harder" he says and I bite down on his lip harder, he then let's out a moan which turned me on so bad which caused me to moan too. And with that Marilyn sticks his tongue in my mouth and caressed his tongue with mine, he then began to put his hand slightly underneith my shirt and around my waist while laying me down flat onto the couch. He moves his hands up my waist, to my stomach and reaches my bra, he grabs ahold of my breasts and I breath heavily. "Do you want me to stop?" Marilyn says while pulling away from my neck, "are you kidding!?" I reply out of breath. He giggles and continues to feel me up, I decide to give him something in return so I start to slide my hands from off his waist and down to his pelvis, I reach his groin and feel his massive bulge. "Oh fuck" I say in surprise from what I'm feeling, "aha i know " Marilyn says with a smirk and I smirk back at him.

Just when things were going so well... *cough cough* we hear someone in the distance. Marilyn and I look up and see Trent Reznor looking at us, We break apart quickly and fix ourselves up. "Sorry to interrupt..." Trent begins to say. "Yeah I bet you are..." Marilyn replies in a stubborn tone. "We need to talk" Trent says to Marilyn. Marilyn stands up and turns back towards me, he leans down and kisses me gently on my lips before walking off somewhere with Trent. I'm left alone.

A couple hours went by and we are staring to get closer to where I live, I start to feel anxious. Marilyn finally comes back into the room but has a sad expression on his face and Trent awkwardly walks in behind him, 'what the hell happened?' I thought. Marilyn walks towards me and silently sits down next to me, not even looking at me. "M-Marilyn?..." I say. He slowly looks up and into my eyes then quickly looks away. "What's wrong?" I ask innocently. Marilyn looks up towards Trent and forms another sad look on his face then sighs, he looks back towards me. "Claire... I need to tell you something and I don't want you to get upset..." He says. "What, what is it!?" I say in a panic, he can see I am staring to freak out so he puts his hands on my shoulders and looks deeply into my eyes. "You know I care for you and want to be with you but..." He begins to say. "But!?" I raise my voice. "Claire... We- we can't see each other anymore. Once we drop you off and I leave, we have to end whatever we have together, we can't be together anymore... It's-it's just impossible..." He says. I felt like a thousands daggers just went through my heart and my stomach had just been punched so hard that I could just die. "I-I can't believe this..." I say with tears forming in my eyes. "Claire... I'm so sorry..." Marilyn says and I see a tear form in his eye too. I suddenly hear someone moving in the distance so I look up to see Trent with a smug look on his face and walking away, 'This must be Trent's doing!' I thought to myself. Marilyn was fine and happy with me before he went with Trent and now he's this...

We finally reach a holt which means we've finally arrived at my house. Everyone stands up and I begin to say my goodbyes to everyone, I hug all of Marilyn's and Trent's band members and staff, they were so friendly to me and now I have to leave everyone, it's not fair. I step off the bus and Marilyn steps off with me, we walk a bit further away from the bus, so we could be alone, I could see that this was Marilyn's goodbye to me. "Claire." He says. "Yes Marilyn?" I reply. "You know this is goodbye right?" He says. "It-it doesn't have to be..." I reply. "Yes it does." He says. "But why!? You didn't even give me a reason!" I protest. I could see Marilyn really wanted to tell me but he was so choked up, he couldn't tell me. "Look, I know that whatever Trent told you is the reason why your doing this right now but... I just want you to know that no matter what I'm not giving up on you, your the only person in this world I ever want to be with and I'm not just going to let you go off and leave me forever, I'm just not." I say, I see Marilyn is looking into my eyes and has a stunned expression on his face, "But... how?" He asks. "We'll find a way" I say. And just like I go up on my tippy toes and kiss him passionately on his lips, I could feel tears flowing out of my eyes, this hurts so much! Marilyn kisses back even more and we begin to gasp for air? We break apart and look into each other's eyes, "I love you" Marilyn says, "I love you too." I reply. Marilyn wraps his arms around me and pulls me in tight, I cuddle up to him and embrace him for the last time... I feel him kiss me on my forehead gently for the one last time, then he finally breaks away from me and walks off, he hops back onto the bus. I open my eyes and watch as the tour bus drives off into the distance, "goodbye..." I say softly, before walking into my house.

Thank you for reading!
Please vote and comment,
Hope you enjoyed this chapter ^_^
Ps, this is not the end ;)