Toilet

Bengay

Hello Readers, special thanks for the comments.  I decided to post early this week. If I could have any special ability, I would want telekinesis.  Then I could clean my whole house while sitting on my ass, relaxing, watching TV.  Plus, I think it would be awesome. 

 AMBER'S POV

With the stealth of an assassin, I defeated Michael, momentarily disabling him.  Like a thief in the dark, I stole a few old people candies at the front service desk, the hundred year old hard mint ones that never taste good, shoved them in my pocket and took flight.  Michael groaned in agony, holding his junk, as if gripping to see if his goods were still intact. 

I was so high off adrenaline, I ran for forty-five seconds straight.  I was in total beast mode.  No one and nothing could stop me.  Until I almost got hit by a car.  Probably wasn’t the brightest idea to run in the street. Despite zero contact, I still crumpled to the pavement, and I stood up on wobbly legs trying to quiet my racing heart.

“I’m sorry, am I in your way? Don’t worry about getting out of the vehicle.  I’m alright.  Thanks for asking,” I said, giving her the finger. 

“Get out of the goddamn road!” The driver screamed.  She stepped on the gas, gesturing for me to move.

“You nearly hit me,” I rejoined.

This woman believed she was superior, smarter, better than everyone.  Her head held high with righteousness, she flicked her wrist, exposing rings on every finger.

I looked at my clothes.  I was still covered in my own fecal matter.  Compared to this woman, I looked homeless.  Regaining strength in my legs, bravado coursed through my veins as I waved bye-bye to the snobby wench. 

This time, I expected both ways before I cut across the street and when I was safely across, I looked backwards at the grumpy lady.  Because she had parked in the center of a busy street, someone hit her in the rear.  Forgetting about me, she now started to harass the driver responsible for the fortuity.

I was lost, obscured, and mad.  I limped over to a market store, intent on buying Bengay cream.  I quickly navigated through the store and found what I was looking for. Without even paying for it, I opened the box and the unscrewed the top, forcing the white cream into my fat chubby hand.  It was cold and smelled like peppermints and old people.  I lathered myself in it, taking special care to avoid my face. 

I brought the box to the front counter and explained the situation.  I didn’t have any money and someone had to pay for this wretched smelling, muscle relieving cream. 

“See that lady screaming over there?” I asked.  “She's the one in the car accident.  She will pay for this.”

The lady spoke with a heavy accent.  “You pay or I call police.”

“Thank you.  You have a great day too,” I said and bowed to the ancient woman behind the counter. 

I left the store and the lady was very angry.  I must be really popular.  Despite her accent, I understood her.  She went on screaming ‘come back stupid, come back’.  She was very old, her skin hung in ways that aren’t even displayed in horror films.

Her veins were more than just outstanding; they were like vines bulging out of her torso.  The horror of witnessing her face is unexplainable.  I was sweating in embarrassing places.  Between swamp ass and damp clothes, I was pretty hot. 

I felt so hot and sticky that I felt itchy.  I scratched my private lady parts, forgetting about the bengay cream lingering on my hands.  I started to scream in agony.  I have never suffered such pain.  It literally felt like my vagina was on fire. 

“Amber, are you alright?” Nicole demanded.

“It would be nice if you were here in person,” I exclaimed. 

I nevertheless resisted at the entryway of the shop. The old woman behind the counter looked at me as if I was the spawn of Satan.  She held her rosary and did the sign of the cross. 

“Crazy woman,” she said fearfully. 

I looked at the woman across the street, yelling like a madwoman.  Yes, she was crazy indeed. 

“I'd have to agree.”

The lady looked horrified, stupefied, and somewhat confused.

“You need straightjacket,” she retorted.

“No, I’m very warm.  But thank you though.”  Man, this lady doesn’t shut-up. 

“Amber, no one else can hear me.  You don’t have to think out loud.  I can listen to your thoughts,” Nicole explained.

“Thinking hurts my brain so I try to do that as little as possible.”

“Tim is on his way.  He’s coming to rescue you.  All you need to do is get someplace safe until he arrives.  I will guide you to a safe place.”

“Whatever you say.”

“I call the cops,” the old lady said. 

 Victoria’s POV

 “How could you let her escape?” 

“I can fix this,” Michael explained. 

“I support your existence because I thought you would be a valuable asset. Perhaps I should just kill you and do all the work myself!”

“Let me get her back.  Let me prove myself to you.”

“I am more powerful than you.  I could destroy you.”

“And you are wise not to.  I will get her back.”

“No.  You have done enough damage.  If you want something done right, you got to do it yourself.”

“What are you going to do Victoria?”

“I’m going to make an appearance.  I’m going to reveal myself to Tim, make him fall in love with me, show him the light.”

“You mean the darkness,” Michael snickered. 

With lightning speed, I slapped the side of his head, enjoying the laughter as it died in his throat.

“Don’t patronize me.  I won’t hesitate to kill you.”

“What is it you want me to do, exactly?”

“Find Amber.”

“Okay, easy.”

“And kill her.”