aliens are stupid • ben parish

09

Just as Ringer said after a few days I get into the swing of this whole army melarky. It's not as hellish as before but that's probably because Ringer is getting Zombie to whip us into shape so Reznik hasn't had a go at us since last Friday and squad 53 are slowly moving up the leaderboard.

It's getting better, I'm getting better. My leg is now basically fully healed and I can run with out looking like a penguin.

'Sorry but who decided to include this in a soldier's job description?' I ask to no one in particular. It's our turn to do P and D and frankly, it is disgusting.

If they're so up for us becoming soldiers should we not be training now instead of shovelling dead people down a big hole?

The smell of death surrounds us and I hold my breath, I check my watch, only five more minutes. I can survive that right? Thankfully five minutes comes around pretty quickly and we're sent back to the bunks. No freedom round here.

The boys start up a card game with Ringer. Teacup, Nugget and I sit and watch. I'm fascinated by this game. It seems to have been completely made up but it looks quite full on.

After a while it's pretty obvious the boys are getting thrashed by Ringer. Another sudden turn of jealousy towards her hits me but then again she's showing them who's boss.

The game finishes with Flintstone storming off to the bunk he shares with Poundcake and saying something along the lines of: 'I wish she stayed in her old squad.' Which I knew of course was impossible because Ringer told me she'd been moved from her old squad because of discipline issues.

I too soon got tired of the general chit-chat floating round the room and head off to my bunk. I slide between the sheets and close my eyes. Trying to block out their consistent banter.

---

The next day, Zombie tells us that we will be spending the first half of the day at hand-to-hand combat. Which is my favourite of all the training activities. I get to show the boys that I'm not just some weak girl.

When we reach the room were we do hand-to-hand combat, Reznik is already there getting ready to bark orders at us.

'Everyone partner up. Your aim is to get your opponent on the ground. Anything else that happens is a bonus.' She sneers and then saunters off leaving us to it.

'Hey Nugget?' I ask the little boy who is standing all alone in the corner of the room. He looks terrified. 'Do you want to partner up with me?'

I was going to partner with Ringer but when I look for her she's standing on a mat with Zombie. Mr and Mrs Perfect. I feel a slight pang of jealousy but I shove it to the back of my mind and focus on Nugget.

'Sure!' He says instantly brightening up. 'Can you show me that kick you used on Flint last time?'

He's referring to our last hand-to-hand session when Flintstone had asked me to fight him. I sent a kick flying at the side of his head because he's been taunting me. I was aiming for his face but he moved just in time.

He ended up in a heap on the floor and a massive red mark on the side of his face which eventually faded out to a purple bruise the next day.

That kick earned me an applause from the rest of the squad from Reznik, she was even smiling at me when she congratulated me.

'Sure thing Nugget I'll show you how to do that. Just as long as you promise not to do it to me?' I laugh and the boys big brown eyes shine up at me.

The only problem is with teaching Nugget this is that I don't exactly know how I did it. It just sort of happened.

Nugget and I stand on a mat to the right of Zombie and Ringer. Nugget chose it, he looks up to Zombie a lot.

'So Nugget,' I tell him. 'I'm going to show you how I did it but I promise I won't hurt you okay?'

'Okay.' He says his eyes shining with excitement, a grin spreading across his face.

I re-in-act what I did to Flintstone on Nugget but instead I gently tap the side of his head with my foot. He giggles and I smile. He's so young, he had his whole life ahead of him and the Others came down and took everything away from him.

'Okay now you try!' I say and kneel down to I'm at the right level for his foot.

He runs towards me his face in a concentrated frown. Well this looks like he's going to boot me full force in the head. I brace myself.

Nugget lifts his leg and brings his foot to the edge of my head. I gasp and shut my eyes because I was expecting a hit but he just taps me.

'You didn't expect me to kick you properly?' Nugget gasps. 'You're Cassie's best friend!'

'Yeah I guess I was.' I say standing up and ruffling Nugget's hair. Thinking about Cassie makes my heart sink.

'She's coming to get me. She promised.' Nugget says and I look down at him. Cassie's obviously not coming. She's probably dead. Just like the other 97% of the Earth.

'Of course she is!' I say sadly to Nugget and he runs off.

'Zombie! Zombie! Zombie! Look was Switchblade taught me!' He shouts running over to the pair next to us that are having what seems like a face off.

Oh no. He is not bringing Zombie over here.

'Okay then bud,' Zombie says smiling down at Nugget and walking over to me. Nugget's the only person here that can get the Ben Parish smile out of Zombie.

They walk over to me, painfully slowly. Ringer saunters over behind the two boys. I take a deep breath and smile at the people now standing in front of me.

'Okay Nugget let's see what you got!' Ringer says and I kneel down again so Nugget can reach my head.

He repeats what he did before and gets a round of applause from Zombie. I try to hide the smile on my face as Zombie tells me well done.

Nugget jumps up and hugs me.

'Thank you Switchblade! That was awesome!' Nugget tells me and runs off again leaving me flopped on the blue mat.

Ringer and Zombie have left too. Just as I stand up Reznik storms in.

'Squad 53 change of plan! You will be in the courtyard this afternoon! Team training exercise!' She yells and then dismisses us for lunch.

This is the first time I'll be doing a team exercise with Squad 53 and the thought of it makes me nervous. What's this exercise going to include?

As I sat eating my lunch, I thought of the things they could make us do. They seem like the sort of people that would let us run loose with real guns and grenades. That didn't sound particularly appealing to me. What sort of human lets kids run around with real explosives?

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