Morphine

twenty four : don't think

My hands move of their own accord as I feel a deep, innate urgency to get Zahid out of here. I don't think about how my world just shifted and I'm suddenly at the edge of it. I don't think about how true his words are. I don't think about the consequences of what I'm doing. I don't think.

"Don't even think about escaping." I warn him. Standing on the tips of my toes, I try to undo the knot tethering him to the shower rod. With his legs off the floor the rope is stretched taught with no extra space for any sort of movement.

"If you can tell me a place for me to escape to, then I'll think about it." Although taller than me his eyes are at the same level as mine. The deep emotion in them wills me to do this faster.

"I can't untie it." Looking around the bathroom for any sharp object is useless. Everything has been cleared, no toothbrushes, the cabinets are empty, the towel racks dry and dusty. Absolutely nothing. I try not to start panicking. If I'm this close and unable to free him then I don't know... my plan is falling apart.

Zahid wriggles his fingers trying to loosen the hold but it doesn't work. He looks at me and I don't know what he sees but the hopelessness in his eyes fades and he says in a much firmer voice, "What's in your bag? Please tell me you brought a knife of some sort."

"Yes!" I exclaim. I remove the bag off my shoulders and drop it on the table. "Yes, I did." I didn't walk in unarmed.

Think, start thinking.

Think but don't process it, I tell myself. I need to get out of here. I need to get us both out of here. I'm surprised my dad hasn't come barging in here to check on Zahid. Chase would have surely informed everyone by now.

Don't think about him.

I unzip a compartment inside my bag and pull out a small but sharp blade. Standing on my toes again I try to run the blade over the rope. I can't reach anything beyond the knot. If I try slashing there I risk cutting his wrist.

There's no toilet in here for me to stand on. What sort of a bathroom is this?

"It's too far away," I tell him.

He thinks for a moment and then says, "Climb me. Get on my hips, you can reach it that way."

"Don't be ridiculous." I feel like laughing but he tilts his head as if saying Why not?

"Because I'm heavy and pulling you down with my weight will make the rope tighter." He looks at me incredulously and I add "Plus you're injured."

"You're not that heavy." He would know; he carried me over his shoulder like dead weight that day. "Don't you know that a tighter rope is easier to cut? And don't worry about me. Just do it fast." He orders and I glare at him.

It could work, what's the harm in trying? We need to get out of here.

"I didn't go to school for a very long time, so no I didn't know that."

"Whatever, just do it."

I place the blade between my lips carefully and put my hands on his shoulders. His skin is sweaty but I pay no attention to that. He looks pale and dehydrated. The only moisture on him is due to his perspiration. I try not to think about how this is the same body that tried to force me into submission that day, same face that kissed me hungrily that day. I jump up and wrap my legs around his hips. He grunts but I don't make a move to get back down. Keeping one hand steady on his shoulder, I take the blade with my other hand and reach up to cut the rope.

I try not to think about my chest being pressed into his face or his warm breath through my shirt. Don't think.

As he said the rope is much tighter and definitely makes it easy for me. I can see each fibre breaking apart as I cut it vigorously. Once I'm done, I immediately jump away from him. The rope breaks and he sags. Unable to stand he falls to the floor on his knees and takes a deep breath. While he removes the rest of the rope from his wrists, I stuff the blade in my pocket and sling my bag over my shoulder.