Beacon Hills(Sterek Fanfiction)(BxB)

Layer by Layer

Chapter 6 | Stiles' POV

It's funny how one person can completely unravel your life and turn it into something completely different.

When I say one person I mean Derek Hale and by your life I mean mine...

I had learned many things about Derek.

How he was born a werewolf than bitten, when he gets shy he has this habit of pressing his lips together, and how he loves to fill his time reading novels about other worlds of fantasy and adventure. I also learned that he is lonely and lost. Derek has a need for purpose, it was a thirst he couldn't quite quench.

I understood Derek.

He put up a wall to protect himself. He'd lost so many people. Each passing took a piece of him. All that's left is layers of fear, guilt, pain, and pent up anger.

I peeled back the first layer, his fear of letting people in. Maybe we can benefit from one another.

But I'm kidding myself, right?

"Stiles... Stiles!"

"Huh?" I looked up into Derek's forest eyes recognizing the look of concern glazed over them.

"Hey, you okay?"Derek placed his gentle hand on my shoulder giving it a soft squeeze.

"Yeah, um, I guess I just got lost up there for a second. I tend to start thinking then overthinking... It's nothing new."

I looked down at my fingers playing with a string hanging off my pants.

"You sure you're okay?"Derek moved his hand down my arm to wrap his long fingers over my elbow, his warm touch sending tingles through out my arm.

Derek's thumb rubbed there in a slow motion that being all I could focus on. That touch. That one small touch and I felt completely weak.

Derek looked confused for a moment before he let go of my arm.

"Something wrong?" I asked rubbing where I could still feel the ghost of his touch.

"It's just-"

Derek went silent his eyes skimming over my fidgeting hands in my lap.

"Every time I touch you, I can sense your pain. It's usually only physical pain though."

"Oh." I blurted out, my eyes downcast. I scratched the back of my neck then getting up from the floor to sit in my desk chair.

I swallowed the lump in my throat that had formed. I felt like such a hypocrite. I asked for Derek to let me me in, yet here I am staying quiet.

There's this feeling in my gut telling me I can trust him. Can I?

"Are you hurt?" Derek asked.

"Sort of? Not exactly- I mean, I feel fine right now. It's nothing you should worry about."

The words raced off my tongue in one long sentence.

Derek nodded looking down as he captured his bottom lip between his teeth. He appeared to be thinking.

"You can tell me... Or don't... I'll be here when you're ready."

Derek's voice was filled with tenderness and patience.

"Can I do something?" I asked getting up from the desk chair.

Derek was about to stand up,

"No, stay there...please." I said, sounding as if I were desperate.

Derek peered up at me as I stood in front of him, my toes touching the soles of his shoes. I took a breath before hesitantly plopping on Derek's lap with as much grace as I could muster.

Derek gasped in surprised but his eyes never left mine.

I hadn't noticed till now how beautiful his eyes really were. They held so much mystery. There's so much I wanted to discover still...

I rested my head on his shoulder as I gripped the front of Derek's shirt.

"It's okay." Derek whispered in my ear," it's okay to not be okay. You don't have to pretend or censor yourself around me. Okay?"

I nodded as I silently sobbed into the crook of his neck, Derek's arms wrapped around me.

That day I learned it's okay to not be okay.

Pain demands to be felt. It can't tell you when it'll hit you, but you have the choice on how you use that pain.

I choose to not let it make me weak.

But stronger.